This Week's News | Jon Stewart Critiques Trump's WHCD Set & Jordan Klepper Eyes Fauci's Explosive Diary

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You're listening to Comedy Central.

**Jon Stewart** (2:07)
The United States and Iran taking a hydration break.
A welcome cessation of hostilities. The respite gave President Trump a chance to stop bombing the Strait of Hormuz and to start bombing at the White House Correspondents' Dinner.

**Donald Trump** (2:28)
The other day, a senator I knew got a text, a great guy, from his wife.
And she said, when you get home, I want to have you immediately come up the stairs and make love to me. And he said, I can't do both. You know what, you know? In other words, you can't go up the stairs and make love. Does anybody get that?

**Jon Stewart** (2:53)
You know, normally I'd say don't quit your day job. But in this case.
I will make an exception. Yes, Friday night was the White House Correspondents' Dinner, part of, yeah, where the media elite got to hobnob with hobgoblins. If you remember, the first attempt ended prematurely by, let's say, very intense heckling. The frightening scene prevented the president from delivering his humorous remarks, prepared remarks, which was a shame, because if there's one thing the president Trump is known for, it's his joyful love of mirth.

**SPEAKER_9** (3:38)
We all know that he has a great sense of humor. He's gonna deliver a really good speech.

**SPEAKER_10** (3:43)
I mean, he's funny.

**SPEAKER_1** (3:44)
He is hilarious, entertainer.

**SPEAKER_11** (3:47)
His comedic timing is really good.

**Jordan Klepper** (3:48)
If he hadn't become president, he could have become a stand-up comedian.

**SPEAKER_9** (3:51)
This guy is honestly one of the funniest presidents we've ever had.

**SPEAKER_11** (3:55)
I think Trump's the funniest president of all time.

**Jon Stewart** (3:58)
Funny how? How the f*** is he funny? Does he amuse you? How the f***? What's so f***ing funny?
No, seriously, I am asking you.
Because when I was watching him do that one joke, he doesn't seem very funny at all. Hey, but you know what, man? Look, I've been in that situation. We all try new material, doesn't go, you move on to the next one. You cannot judge Trump's whole hour long special. Just based on that one joke, Mr. President, what else you got?

**Donald Trump** (4:37)
The UFC Freedom 250 fight. I'm pleased to announce that we're going to host an even bigger one right in front of the White House every Friday night.

**Jon Stewart** (4:47)
See, this is great. Simple premise, easy, refillable. We're going to be hosting more fights. So, these are just going to be jokes about who's on the card, what the fights are going to be. It's simple. Set up, punchline.
Or...

**Donald Trump** (5:05)
It's every Friday night, every Saturday night, we're going to have fights in front of the White House.