Hegseth Announces Testosterone Tests & Vance Fixates on Biden’s Ice Cream Licking | Jake Johnson

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You're listening to Comedy Central.

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From the most trusted journalists at Comedy Central, it's America's only source for news. This is The Daily Show with your host, Michael Kosta.

**Michael Kosta** (1:31)
I'm feeling it. Welcome to The Daily Show.

**Desi Lydic** (1:33)
Wow, what a great crowd.

**Michael Kosta** (1:35)
I'm Michael Kosta. We got so much to talk about tonight. JD Vance has complicated feelings about meat. Pete Hegseth wants to see your chest hair, and the World Cup is almost over, so time to find another reason to punch a stranger. But first, let's check in on the incredible members of the Trump administration in another edition of The Worst Wing.

**SPEAKER_10** (2:00)
What a bunch of losers.

**Michael Kosta** (2:04)
President Trump is addressing the nation tonight, and because we taped earlier in the day, we don't know yet what he's going to say or which museum he'll be putting his name on. But come on, Museum of African American History and Culture!
But there is one person who does know what's in the speech, and he sure is making the most of it.

**SPEAKER_11** (2:25)
Trump's longtime teleprompter operator is accused of using inside knowledge to cash in on prediction markets, allegedly making more than $100,000 by betting on what the president would or would not say.

**Michael Kosta** (2:38)
Honestly, respect. You know what I'm saying? Oh, I know people are going to say it's cheating if he knows what words are in the prompter, but with Trump, that's not a sure thing.
For example, let's say he puts a bet down that Trump is going to read the word magnificent in a speech.

**SPEAKER_10** (2:56)
And just across the bridge in front of Arlington Cemetery, a building in magnificent, really beautiful.

**SPEAKER_6** (3:03)
Does that count? Does that count?

**Michael Kosta** (3:07)
I hope it does, because I put a 200 large on it. Now, obviously, using a teleprompter to win bets is a recipe for trouble. I mean, I read from a prompter, and I know our operator would never purple bananas, purple bananas, purple bananas. God damn it, Christina.
But I assume Trump is cool with this. I mean, game, recognize game.

**SPEAKER_13** (3:29)
He's on unpaid administrative leave right now.

**SPEAKER_2** (3:31)
There are very strict ethical guidelines here at the White House.

**Michael Kosta** (3:37)
But did she just say there are very strict ethical guidelines at the White House? This is like claiming that Love Island has a dress code.
Nice track. Let's move on to someone in the West Wing who's slightly less important than the prompter guy, JD Vance, Vice President and the weak link in your improv group. He's been on the podcast circuit lately to plug his memoir and share a bit about himself. But I feel like he's oversharing.

**SPEAKER_12** (4:08)
The thing I couldn't get over Biden is the way that he ate ice cream. I mean, it's like, we could bring some of this stuff up, but it's like they would get him eating ice cream in the most ridiculous suggestive way imaginable.

**Michael Kosta** (4:23)
Suggestive? I mean, I remember seeing Joe Biden eating ice cream, but I remember pitching a tent over it.

**SPEAKER_12** (4:33)
I...

**Michael Kosta** (4:33)
You ever meet someone with a kink and they assume you have it too? Man, man, look at that goat just teasing us. But if you actually look at Joe Biden eating ice cream, there's nothing suggestive about it. I mean, look at this. The man uses his teeth. He's biting it like a shark. Either JD Vance doesn't know what he's talking about or I've been giving blowjobs wrong this whole time.
But Rocky Road isn't Vance's only sexual food hangup. You know how politicians are always being photographed awkwardly eating food at a state fair? JD is not gonna let that happen to him.