Tony Kinnett Joins!

SPEAKER_1 (0:01)

You're listening to The Hammer and Nigel Show.

Nigel (0:03)

Oh, hi, I'm Nigel.

Jason Hammer (0:05)

Jason Hammer right over there. We're the very special guest on the hotline.

Hammer (0:09)

A man that had the best speech at the UN convention this past week.

Jason Hammer (0:15)

Oh.

Hammer (0:15)

Well, correct that. I don't believe he was there, but it was still the best speech, Tony Kinnett from The Tony Kinnett Cast every Monday through Friday, right after our show at 7 p.m. Tonus, how are you?

Tony Kinnett (0:29)

You know, I may not be the most qualified guy to go speak in front of the UN, but I can promise you my speech would be one of the most memorable in the entire history of the organization.

Jason Hammer (0:37)

I believe it.

Hammer (0:39)

The opening line, fellow drunken hillbillies.

Tony Kinnett (0:45)

Oh, man. Find a way. I will be reading a list of slurs in your own languages. Now, please get out of my country.

Hammer (0:53)

Before we get into nuts and bolts and important things, we were kind of having a text exchange about this.

If you could prank any of the world leaders that were there for the big UN extravaganza, what would you do? Who would it be?

Tony Kinnett (1:11)

So, I mean, clearly there's so many great choices here. I would love to get the French delegation like in an elevator and then start playing German marching music, you know, just for some. Yeah, just a little, you know, you know. But then also, you know, I want to wait until it's about three in the morning and then outside of the Japanese delegation's hotel room, I want to play the loud T-Rex noises, so they think Godzilla is on the march, you know, like, come on, I mean, if we're going to have a cultural celebration here, then we ought to go all out. You know what I'm saying?

Hammer (1:42)

I'm with you. Greet the French with nothing but like surrender flags, make them feel at home, you know, make them feel comfortable. I could get with something like that.

Tony Kinnett (1:49)

Send a lot of deodorant coupons to the Greek delegation. I mean, you could do all kinds of stuff here.

Jason Hammer (1:55)

Did McCrone say something stupid about Hamas and Israel and that and of that like? Oh, yeah.

Tony Kinnett (2:04)

So remember in the 2016 election when Gary Johnson was roasted for not knowing where Aleppo, Syria was, they were like, hey, where's Aleppo? I don't know.

Nigel (2:14)

What's Aleppo with you?

Tony Kinnett (2:15)

And then everyone like died a little on the inside. So Emmanuel McCrone said, well, I mean, sure, maybe there's Hamas inside of the Gaza Strip, but they're not active in the West Bank or anywhere else.

Jason Hammer (2:27)

Palestinians are like, yeah, my brain.

Hammer (2:31)

And afterwards, did he do the prototypical French laugh?

SPEAKER_1 (2:37)

I tell you, man, that we'd not only lose on the real battlegrounds, but in debates as well.

Hammer (2:42)

Oh, so ridiculous.

Jason Hammer (2:46)

Wow.

Hammer (2:47)

What did you make of Trump's speech? He kind of covered a lot of ground. There was a little bragging about America, a little crapping on Iran, a little bit of everything.

Tony Kinnett (2:59)

I mean, it's very, very Trump.

SPEAKER_1 (3:02)

So he gets up, he's like, you know, who's really great? It's me. You know, Marco, I was talking to the other day and I thought, you know, we need another arc to Trump right here. It's quite amazing.

Tony Kinnett (3:12)

And then he flipped off the Cubans, which was awesome.

Jason Hammer (3:15)

And they walked out, they walked out, right?

Tony Kinnett (3:17)

Oh yeah.

Well, three of them walked out. One of them got a little lost on the way there. So like one guy started to walk out and then he started to turn left. And the lady behind him was like, no, no, senor, no, no, izquierda, derecho, derecho.

Jason Hammer (3:30)

To the other way. It's like Biden.

Tony Kinnett (3:32)

Somebody from Senegal had to like bump him the other way because the Cuba guy was going to walk right over to the CIA booth and we're not allowed to make those jokes on the radio.

Hammer (3:40)

So Nigel's right. We could sit here and laugh about what happened to the Cubans. But our president for four years needed to have somebody direct him in the right direction when it was Biden.

Tony Kinnett (3:51)

I mean, again, well, Biden wasn't allowed to go to the, you know, the UN delegation meetings because you get really drunk with the Irish prime minister. So like, you have to do what you can. You really have to do what you can.