Through depression and doubt

**SPEAKER_1** (0:00)
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**Mary Reichard** (0:26)
You're listening to a special weekend edition of The World and Everything In It. I'm Mary Reichard. Today, we're talking with a man whose very existence challenges some of our culture's deepest assumptions about human worth. My guest is Ryan Bomberger, co-founder of the Radiance Foundation and Emmy Award-winning creative professional, speaker and author of the new memoir titled, Should Have Been Aborted. Ryan was conceived in rape and adopted into a loving family, and he has spent years making the case that every human life has God-given purpose. In our conversation, we talk about his remarkable adoption story, finding his birth mother decades later, surviving depression and serious health setbacks, and why he believes everyone is wanted by someone.
Well, Ryan, I know that your adoption records were sealed for a long time, and then you finally did find out the name of your birth mom. What were you hoping to find out?

**Ryan Bomberger** (1:27)
You know, my parents have been super supportive of all the adopted children that they wanted to find out more about their birth parents. My parents would give us the information that they had, that they were given, and they were just always honoring of our birth parents. And so since I was a child, even before 13, I always wanted to someday meet my birth mom. But it turned into during my teenage years and later, it wasn't that I wanted a connection necessarily or a relationship. I really just wanted to thank her. That's really all I wanted to do. In fact, when I did finally search for her for the first time, I got my adoption records unsealed because of my circumstances. And I just included two CDs in the letter that I sent for the judge who unsealed it. I wrote the song called Meant To Be, and it was really just a tribute to her courage and showing her just the incredible reverberations of that single decision. And so I really just wanted her to have the song, and I wanted her to know how grateful I was. And so that was my heart, that was my intent. And so seeing her name for the first time blew me away.
My whole life I never knew her name. I had no face, I had no name. And to see that on the birth certificate really was incredibly emotional. Her first name is Sharon.
And, you know, there's power in a name. And just being able to have that, to be able to speak that, that was really important to me. And so for years and years I pursued trying to find out where Sharon was, and maybe if someway somehow I could at least just see her face to face, just to thank her.

**Mary Reichard** (3:10)
Well, we may or may not get to the conclusion of that. Like I said, I don't want to give the whole thing away because it's a very interesting and touching story in itself. There's a line that really stood out to me in the documentary and in your book, and it's what you were referencing there with Sharon, that everyone is wanted by someone. And the fact that Sharon gave birth to you and gave you up meant that she still wanted you to exist. She just couldn't take care of you, right? So what do you mean by everyone is wanted by someone?

**Ryan Bomberger** (3:46)
Well, we have this mentality in our culture that if you're perceived to be unwanted, then any violence against you is justified, which is why we have a million plus abortions a year.
And when I'm asked about my birth mom, and prior to recent revelations, I didn't know why she made the decision that she made, but I can express this part, that she immediately refused abortion because she loved children.
And I was told by a family member that she never would have wanted to abort me because she loved children. And that for me just solidified. It's not just a slogan. It really is a worldview that everyone is wanted by someone, maybe sometimes not by the biological parent or parents, but we're all wanted by someone. I was wanted by Henry and Andrew Pomberger. I have two of my four children are adopted. And they were, they may have been unplanned, but they were definitely wanted deeply. And so that's why a large motivation for writing this book is to get that across to people, that we are all wanted by someone.