This F*cking Guy: Sam Altman

**Erin Ryan** (0:00)
Welcome to another episode of This Fucking Guy, the series where we spotlight one guy making America worse and explain why they suck. I'm Erin Ryan, host of Crooked Media's Hysteria podcast.

**Alyssa Mastromonaco** (0:10)
And I'm Alyssa Mastromonaco, the other host of Crooked Media's Hysteria podcast.

**Erin Ryan** (0:15)
Today, we're going to dive into the life and lies, the fibs and foibles of Sam Altman. Scam Altman, if you're nasty.

**Alyssa Mastromonaco** (0:20)
The open AI guy.

**Erin Ryan** (0:22)
The open AI guy, before he was the face of an unproven, unprofitable technology that nobody asked for, an empty promise that has the entire system of capitalism by the tender danglers, Altman spent decades in Silicon Valley cozying up to the right people.

**Alyssa Mastromonaco** (0:35)
And it's a good thing too, because there have been a few times in Altman's career when a normal person would have been run out of town.

**Erin Ryan** (0:41)
Like Pete Hegseth, he's fucked up three different organizations. Like Peter Thiel, he's made people close to him believe that he might be a liar or a sociopath. Only time will prove whether or not Sam Altman is lying about this AI thing, and by that time, he might have moved on to a new scam. Because every time Sam Altman proves inept at something, he's rewarded with more responsibility.

**Alyssa Mastromonaco** (1:02)
Ah, the Silicon Valley Special. Another megalomaniac tech bro who has bamboozled millions into believing he's the Yoda of innovation when he's actually just a less wrinkly Emperor Palpatine.

**Erin Ryan** (1:13)
I would say he's more like a guy who pretends to be Emperor Palpatine at children's birthday parties, because he doesn't have the force. He and his friends can't shoot lightning bolts. They've all agreed to pretend that they have it, and that elaborate game of pretend may take the entire world down with it.

**Alyssa Mastromonaco** (1:27)
Here we go again.

**Erin Ryan** (1:28)
Samuel Harris Altman was born on April 22nd, 1985 in Chicago, Illinois to a Jewish family. His mother was a dermatologist, his dad was a real estate broker. In 1989, the family moved to Clayton, Missouri in the St. Louis area.

**Alyssa Mastromonaco** (1:41)
Pretty unremarkable.

**Erin Ryan** (1:42)
Altman's backstory is positively Zuckerbergian. When Altman was eight, he received his first computer. According to him, he would fiddle and faddle around with the hardware and software as a way to pass time. When he got a bit older, his parents sent him to a fancy private school called the John Burroughs School, because of course they did.

**Alyssa Mastromonaco** (2:00)
Altman has two brothers, Jack and Max, and a sister named Annie, who is nine years younger than Sam. Growing up, Sam and Annie were close. Annie would later claim that as a child, Sam was her favorite brother.

**Erin Ryan** (2:11)
Beyond their shared childhood, Annie's life would diverge sharply from her brothers when she became an adult. The youngest Altman was never in the tech space. She was an artist and podcaster who alternately had a hard time holding down a regular job and supported herself through sex work on OnlyFans.

**Alyssa Mastromonaco** (2:26)
In 2025, Anne Altman filed a lawsuit against Sam, claiming he had sexually abused her for nine years, starting when she was three. She claimed in legal filings that because of the alleged abuse, she'd suffered from, quote, PTSD, severe emotional distress, mental anguish, and depression. End quote.

**Erin Ryan** (2:43)
Annie had been publicly alluding to have experienced sexual abuse for years, including on a 2023 Instagram reel. After the lawsuit was filed, Sam and the rest of the Altmans released a joint statement, vehemently denying Annie's allegations, saying in part, quote, all of these claims are utterly untrue. The situation causes immense pain to our entire family. It is especially gut wrenching when she refuses conventional treatment and lashes out at family members who are genuinely trying to help. We ask for understanding and compassion from everyone as we continue to support Annie in the best way we can. We sincerely hope she finds the stability and peace she's been searching for. End quote.

**Alyssa Mastromonaco** (3:18)
This sounds horrible.

**Erin Ryan** (3:19)
Yeah, it's really horrible. Annie Altman requested a jury trial for the civil suit and the litigation is ongoing. Almost every fact of the lawsuit is disputed with the exception of a few big facts. Annie Altman is Sam Altman's baby sister. Nobody disputes that she's dealing with serious mental health issues. Either she's telling the truth about the root of those issues or she isn't.

**Alyssa Mastromonaco** (3:39)
Either scenario is deeply horribly sad.

**Erin Ryan** (3:41)
Sam attended Stanford and intended to study computer science, but he dropped out after two years in order to become a full-time bullshit peddler.