They’re Committing ‘Tism Fraud (with Langston and David)

Langston Kerman (0:01)

Wave.

People say I got a drinking problem, that ain't no reason to stop. People saying that I've hit rock bottom, just because I'm living on the rocks. People pulling...

David Gborie (0:50)

You want to run back?

Langston Kerman (0:51)

It's a broken-hearted thinking problem. So pull another bottle off the wall. People say I got a drinking problem, but I got no problem drinking at all.

There it is. There it is. Ladies and gentlemen, little mamas and Gentiles alike, welcome to another phenomenal episode of My Momma Told Me, a wave series.

David Gborie (1:18)

The podcast that dives deep into the pockets of black conspiracy theories and finally works to prove nothing.

Langston Kerman (1:31)

Even when we take our voices down to this level, as we try to Charlie Rose, as we try to get you to take us seriously. Yeah, we know that we are frauds, fools, buffoons, not in the race this way, simply in the shenanigans association.

David Gborie (1:53)

I think that sometimes when I talk low at the end of my breath, it makes it seem like what I'm saying has more thought than it does.

Langston Kerman (2:03)

Yeah, I think that's fair.

David Gborie (2:05)

Like I'm really struggling to get the words out. And I'm not.

Langston Kerman (2:16)

Yeah.

David Gborie (2:17)

I'm not at all.

Langston Kerman (2:17)

No, it's all a performance. Frankly, we've been performing from the beginning.

David Gborie (2:22)

It could not be more off the top of my head. Inside, I'm panicking.

Langston Kerman (2:31)

You know we are not planning these things because one of us bailed on the bit so much earlier than the other one.

One of us gave up immediately. The other one was like, I might keep it going the whole episode.

David Gborie (2:45)

Inside of my head is a rat driving a bumper car.

Langston Kerman (2:54)

Literally, the craziest thing to say.

In the craziest speaking voice. You should literally be institutionalized for it.

David Gborie (3:08)

No, it's a problem.

Langston Kerman (3:09)

No, it's not good. But we're back with another episode of David and I, David, Bory, Langston, Kerman. We never say our names.

David Gborie (3:19)

No, we never say our names.

Langston Kerman (3:20)

I realized that pretty recently, that we are not introducing ourselves to people who are potential new fans.

David Gborie (3:28)

Yeah.

Langston Kerman (3:29)

Our YouTube has seen a beautiful search.

David Gborie (3:31)

It's been a bump.

Langston Kerman (3:33)

It's been a nice bump.

David Gborie (3:34)

Bumped up.

Langston Kerman (3:34)

People are fucking with us more, and that's cool.

And in that, we refuse to say hello. We refuse to introduce ourselves. I am Langston.

David Gborie (3:45)

I'm David. And do you think that's why the little bit that we do get recognized, people always make it a point to say, I don't know, your name? I don't know.

Because I've noticed it too. Because you've told me a few times that it happens. And then when it's happened to me more lately, but it's always like, it's always like, they talk to me the way I talk to people who I don't know.

Langston Kerman (4:10)

Yeah.

David Gborie (4:11)

Where it's like, hey, keep doing what you do.

Langston Kerman (4:13)

Nah, man, it's truly, I recognize your face from a thing. Yeah, yeah. And I honor that, even if I don't know why I recognize it.

David Gborie (4:23)

So I have black dudes at work who I get. Hey man, I'm, you know, I like what you guys do.

Hey, I just, me and my wife, not on what she didn't get, I just got recognized and had a conversation with a guy at Jersey Mike's who I found out midway. I did not know. Whoa. I thought it was an old comic who didn't do comedy anymore.

Langston Kerman (4:42)

You thought you were connecting with an old friend. Turns out this is a fan.

David Gborie (4:45)

He said, Bori. I said, oh shit.

Langston Kerman (4:48)

Yeah.

David Gborie (4:48)

Oh, what's up, man? I said hi to his friend.

Langston Kerman (4:51)

Fuck.

David Gborie (4:52)

Yeah.

Langston Kerman (4:52)

Good to see you again.

David Gborie (4:53)

In the middle of the conversation, this is, he kept it real though, this is the best part. In the middle of the conversation, he goes, I'm going to be honest, we never met before.

Whoa!

Langston Kerman (5:04)

That's cool. He let it go for a little while just to feel what it'd be like.

David Gborie (5:12)

Yeah.

Langston Kerman (5:12)

And he was like, nah, man, this ain't right.