The Love Advice Episode

Benny Blanco (0:00)

We have what it takes to give a little love advice.

SPEAKER_2 (0:04)

Hola, Benny, cómo estás?

Jonathan Ernst (0:06)

Hey, how are you doing?

Mare (0:07)

Lil Dicky and his woman.

Dave Burd (0:09)

Tell us everything.

Benny Blanco (0:10)

All right, next caller.

Selena Gomez (0:12)

I love you so much.

SPEAKER_7 (0:14)

There we go, that's what I'm thinking.

Dave Burd (0:16)

We love you.

Kristin Batalucco (0:17)

We're here for you. Look at us now.

Benny Blanco (0:25)

Now, what?

Dave Burd (0:27)

Just sounds like you have something to say.

Benny Blanco (0:28)

I do have something to say.

Dave Burd (0:30)

You know, how long have you been holding it in? Whatever you're about to tell us. I know what he's going to say.

Benny Blanco (0:36)

What I was going to say is I just shaved a bunch of- I just shaved a bunch-

Dave Burd (0:40)

You almost had it.

Benny Blanco (0:41)

No, what I really was going to say is, me and Dave are like unicorns, okay? I'd like to explain why. I think we look so strange. I don't look strange. You look insane.

Chuck, if you weren't Dave, you look insane.

Dave Burd (1:00)

No, I don't think so.

Benny Blanco (1:01)

No. Yes, you do.

Dave Burd (1:02)

I don't look insane.

Benny Blanco (1:03)

Yeah, you do. The only thing-

Kristin Batalucco (1:04)

I don't think he looks insane.

Benny Blanco (1:05)

Of course you don't. You're crazy enough to marry him.

Dave Burd (1:09)

I think I look like cute guy at the bar. You look like the movie Gremlins.

Benny Blanco (1:14)

Chuck, you look identical to me. Chuck, but I'm saying we aren't traditional hot men, but we've somehow been able to spin the world in our direction and land the most intelligent, beautiful, kind-hearted women in the world.

Kristin Batalucco (1:36)

Me too, right?

Benny Blanco (1:37)

You're involved in that.

Kristin Batalucco (1:38)

You're talking about me? You're one of them. You're one of the two.

Dave Burd (1:41)

Level-headed.

Kristin Batalucco (1:41)

I said me too.

Benny Blanco (1:43)

I just think we have what it takes to give a little love advice.

Dave Burd (1:50)

No one really seeks me out for advice. I'll tell you that much.

Kristin Batalucco (1:52)

I do.

Dave Burd (1:54)

Well, no one says, hey, could you give me some advice? I guess they just talked to me and then I, but no one says like, hey, can I get some advice? No one ever asked me that.

SPEAKER_7 (2:02)

Really?

Benny Blanco (2:02)

I've asked you for advice.

Dave Burd (2:03)

I guess you have. You do.

Benny Blanco (2:04)

I've asked you so many times.

SPEAKER_7 (2:05)

You do, you said it.

Benny Blanco (2:05)

We ask each other constantly.

Dave Burd (2:06)

I guess you're right.

Benny Blanco (2:07)

Chuck, I literally send you texts where I'm like, I need five minutes, I need some advice immediately. And then Dave says, can't working.

Dave Burd (2:14)

No, when you say I need some advice, I always.

Benny Blanco (2:16)

No, not always. You say, sometimes you say, can it wait?

SPEAKER_8 (2:20)

You give good advice.

Dave Burd (2:22)

Yeah, I want to know if it can wait.

Benny Blanco (2:23)

Yeah, sometimes it can.

Dave Burd (2:24)

Sometimes they can wait for sure.

Benny Blanco (2:25)

Sometimes it can. Mochi, I feel like you would give really sound, the best, really sound advice as well.

Kristin Batalucco (2:33)

Yeah, but yeah.

Benny Blanco (2:34)

You're like smart, but you're also like cookie, and you get both sides of the coin.

Kristin Batalucco (2:39)

But when I feel pressure on anything, I can't perform.

Benny Blanco (2:42)

Do you feel pressure now?

Kristin Batalucco (2:44)

Mm-hmm. All of a sudden, I feel the weight of the world.

Benny Blanco (2:47)

Really?

Dave Burd (2:48)

I don't think you should. There's no reason for that.

Benny Blanco (2:50)

Well, lucky for you, we got a few callers waiting for us. Now, we've never done this sort of thing, so I don't even know if it works.

Dave Burd (2:59)

So you're telling me that there are people, and this is not fake. There are people sitting there right now at the same time in life as us, and they'll talk to us live and we say something back.

Benny Blanco (3:09)

I tried to set this up. I had people write in things on Instagram over the last week, and then I had no part in this, but the men in there built up a sort of system where it's like a calling situation. I think, I don't even know where there's speakers here.