Is This Anything?

**Nigel** (0:02)
Amber and Nigel present.

**SPEAKER_2** (0:06)
It depends upon what the meaning of the word is. Yes.
Is this anything?

**SPEAKER_3** (0:13)
All right, let's rock and roll.

**Nigel** (0:14)
Oh yeah, we're brought to you by Indiana Unclaimed, a program presented by the Attorney General's office here in Indiana, reuniting Hoosiers with over $1 million in unclaimed property every single week, fast, easy, and free to search at Indiana Unclaimed.

**Hammer** (0:29)
Is this anything? In Anchorage, Alaska, a black bear wandered into a shopping mall, ate a peach, visited a barber shop, and then left the mall a personal gift before leaving.

**Nigel** (0:45)
Is that right?

**Hammer** (0:46)
Here's one of the barbers.

**SPEAKER_3** (0:48)
It was my first run in with the bear. It was pretty scary. My coworker who's cutting hair in front of me, she yelled, Bear! I looked up from my phone and the bear was walking into the barber shop right next to me. I could have pet it. It was that close. A couple of people were going big to scare him out of the grocery store. He came back around to the barber shop again, but by that time we were able to run back, lock the door, and then we were watching him from the window. That's when he used the restroom in the hallway. It was pretty wild.

**Nigel** (1:18)
You used to do that in the Muncie Mall all of the time when you had to both stay. You just walked in, pooped on the floor, walked out, right?

**Hammer** (1:24)
People would be yelling, trying to shoo me away, but was undeterred.

**Nigel** (1:28)
Now, here's a question for you. We all know, this is something, yeah, if you're living in a place where a bear could just walk in, eat some fruit, and take a poop on the floor, and then walk back out, that is something.

**Hammer** (1:39)
That's how Tony Katz starts every morning.

**Nigel** (1:42)
He doesn't make it to the plumbing?

**Hammer** (1:45)
No, that's why he has a home studio. Like, sometimes he'll leave the webcam on.

**Nigel** (1:51)
So, how do you notify your other... We all know how we'd shoe away a bear, all right? We have great moments in shoeing away bears' history.

**Hammer** (1:58)
Get on! Get out!

**Nigel** (1:59)
Go! Get out of here! Let me ask you another question. How do you notify others around you that there is a bear in proximity? Because I thought it was interesting. Yeah, we were at the barber shop and my coworker said, bear.
That's very nonchalant bear warning.

**Hammer** (2:20)
You can't just throw a casual bear out there. It can't be bear.
There's a bear. No, that doesn't work. Like, if I'm in the studio and I look out of our little glass window and I see a grizzly walking by or even just a black bear from the Smoky Mountains, I'm looking at Avilsyn, I'm looking at Matt Bear, I'm looking at Nigel. Bear!

**SPEAKER_3** (2:44)
Bear!

**Hammer** (2:45)
Oh my God! Like, that's how you got to do it. Like the way Nancy Pelosi would yell wolf in a crowded theater.

**Nigel** (2:52)
Wolf!

**Hammer** (2:55)
I would be yelling bear to Matt Bear and hope some sort of third world portal would open up.

**Nigel** (3:02)
I was in the barber shop and the barber said bear.

**Hammer** (3:05)
How would you yell for bear? Bear!

**Nigel** (3:08)
I don't even think I get the complete word out.

**Hammer** (3:11)
Just B-E-E-E-A-A-A and that's it.

**Nigel** (3:14)
Because I'd be running my ass the opposite direction.

**Hammer** (3:16)
Nigel wouldn't even have time to tell us. He would just leave us.

**Nigel** (3:19)
I'd be trailing off in the background.

**Hammer** (3:21)
George Costanza in the fire episode, where you're knocking children and women out of the way. On your way to the exit.

**Nigel** (3:27)
Old ladies and walkers. Yeah, you're done, grandma.

**Hammer** (3:31)
Allison, how would you respond if you saw a bear in the hallway? I would be the exact opposite because I wouldn't want to scare it. So I would just be like, this is not a drill. There is a bear. Very calm. Stay calm. Nigel, go away.
But there's a sense of urgency in your voice, though. Like, I didn't catch that.

**Nigel** (3:51)
Mom voice.

**Hammer** (3:52)
OK. Yeah, because I didn't catch that in the person in the audio clip there.

**Nigel** (3:57)
Bear. Can you just play it again?
Can you go back?

**SPEAKER_2** (3:59)
This happens a lot to them.

**SPEAKER_3** (4:02)
It was my first run in with the bear. It was pretty scary. My co-worker, who's cutting hair in front of me, she yelled bear. I looked up from my.