How To Make Impostor Syndrome Your Friend

Chris Graham (0:00)

The Six Figure Home Studio, episode 72 You're listening to the Six Figure Home Studio Podcast. The number one resource for running a profitable home recording studio.

Hey guys, welcome to The Six Figure Home Studio Podcast. I'm Chris Graham. Brian is on his honeymoon traveling Europe. He'll be home soon. I miss him more than you guys do, I assure you.

Today, though, I am going to try something a little new. I'm going to try to do a solo podcast. I have something I want to share with you guys. I have a thought that's been on my mind that I think would be healthy for us as a community to work through, to think about, and to ponder. And that's this idea that imposter syndrome can actually be our friend. So you're working on a project, you're making something, you're mixing something, you're recording something, you're writing a song, and all of a sudden, this nasty little voice in the back of your head says one of three things.

You're not a real, fill in the blank, could be songwriter, mix engineer, mastering engineer, producer, whatever. Number two might be you don't measure up. And number three, the third possible lie that I typically see and experience myself is you don't belong. You're not one of them.

These are the three lies of imposter syndrome. These are interesting to me because I believe they're a premise. And a premise is a statement that you make where the very underlying logic just completely makes it irrelevant. And let me explain that a little bit. Imposter syndrome is kind of like a middle school bully. For most of us, I'm sure, all of us audio nerds, middle school was a weird time. Middle school is rough because bullies love to make themselves feel bigger by making other people feel smaller. And in my middle school, there was a particular insult that got really popular with the bullies, and they just loved to level kids with this. It was a premise insult. And I'm going to deliver it for you guys. I'm not comfortable saying this on the mic because it's disgusting. But I think for us to understand how insidious and toxic an evil imposter syndrome is, I think we need a good illustration of what a premise insult is. So here it goes. So the middle school bully walks up to the other kid, typically smaller than him, and he says this nasty thing. He says, Hey, have you told your mom you're gay?

The kid that's being picked on would typically respond by saying, No. And then the bully will come back and retort, Oh my gosh, you're gay. You just haven't told your mom yet. I wish I could go back in time and smack these bullies across the face for at least two reasons. The first is one of my best friends is gay, and I've known him for a very, very, very long time. And to hear more about his story from when he was young, from when he was in this middle school with me, it's really frustrating to imagine someone talking like that to him. The second reason is for a kid who's not gay to hear this type of insult and to be pressured to respond either yes or no to a premise is really frustrating. It's challenging for this kid because the premise is based on a dichotomy. A dichotomy is when you say, hey, you can either choose between option A or option B. There is no option C. So this entire insult is based on a trick. And the trick is getting the victim to believe that it's a yes or no question, that it's either option A or option B and that there is no option C. The right comeback to that, it was so rare but so satisfying to see a kid come back and say, actually, have you told your mom that no one likes you at our school because you're an asshole or something like that? Not many kids were fast enough to come up with that sort of insult to give back to the bully unless they had already heard this premise bully tactic in the first place. So I know this was kind of uncomfortable. I don't like talking like that on the podcast, but I think it's a really healthy thing for us to consider what a premise insult is so that we can understand the premise insults that imposter syndrome put in our mind. And like I said before, there's several premise insults that imposter syndrome will deliver. They are, you're not a real mastering engineer or you don't measure up to other mix engineers or you don't belong with other producers, you don't fit in, you're not one of the cool crowd. And all of these are very interesting because they're not trying to crush you. They're trying to trick you.