Will Aaron Judge Play Tuesday? Craig and Big Mac Talk Yankees Drama

Craig Carton (0:00)

For the money!

I'm halfway home, Big Mac. Halfway home, baby! I put out a video of me eating a banana this morning on Instagram.

Chris McMonigle (0:11)

I saw it.

Craig Carton (0:12)

Did you? I did. Nice, thank you.

Chris McMonigle (0:14)

I saw a very calm peel.

Craig Carton (0:15)

Yeah.

Chris McMonigle (0:16)

I was waiting for the...

Craig Carton (0:17)

Some kind of payoff?

Chris McMonigle (0:18)

Some sort of payoff on the banana video.

Craig Carton (0:20)

No payoff.

Chris McMonigle (0:20)

And then it was just you eating a banana.

Craig Carton (0:22)

Just me eating a banana. I wanted to see if I could get 10,000 views of just me eating a banana.

Chris McMonigle (0:26)

And you're halfway there, is that what you meant?

SPEAKER_3 (0:28)

I just crossed 5,000.

Chris McMonigle (0:29)

That's good for you.

Craig Carton (0:30)

Yeah, so I'm pretty happy about it.

Chris McMonigle (0:31)

I mean, 5,000 people watched you eat a banana.

Craig Carton (0:33)

Yeah, yeah. Very alluring.

Chris McMonigle (0:35)

Yeah. What made you choose the eating of a banana?

SPEAKER_3 (0:37)

I was bored this morning.

Craig Carton (0:38)

I had a banana. I was bored. The camera was on. I said, start taping.

SPEAKER_3 (0:43)

Ate a banana.

Craig Carton (0:43)

No words.

SPEAKER_3 (0:44)

Genius.

Craig Carton (0:44)

To the very end.

SPEAKER_3 (0:46)

Yeah, breakfast is the most important meal of the day.

Chris McMonigle (0:47)

When stories are told about you at the end of your life, at the end of your career or whatever, and you talk about the greatness of Craig, someone's going to stand there and go, and then he just said, turn the camera on while eating a banana. Ate a banana. We knew this was genius at work.

Craig Carton (1:01)

What I'm saying, if 10,000 people watch me eat a banana, no music, no words to the very end, when I finished the banana, I said breakfast is the most important meal of the day. That's all I say the entire time, just eating a banana.

That's right.

SPEAKER_3 (1:18)

Yeah.

Craig Carton (1:19)

Halfway home.

It's a little societal test I'm doing. So feel free to go to my Instagram account. I think it's Craig Carton Show.

SPEAKER_3 (1:26)

Sure.

Craig Carton (1:27)

And watch me eat a banana. And then if you have any requests for other things you'd like to watch me eat, by all means, comment.

Chris McMonigle (1:37)

Why don't you just join OnlyFans and try and actually make some money?

Craig Carton (1:40)

I'm not sure if there's a marketplace for old bald guys.

You'd be surprised. With ugly feet, not sure. But I did talk to-

SPEAKER_3 (1:48)

Slap that banana around your face first.

Craig Carton (1:49)

I did talk to Brian Urlacher this morning, had an hour long conversation with him.

SPEAKER_3 (1:53)

Really?

Craig Carton (1:54)

Disgusted with Colin Kaepernick's antics. A.

Chris McMonigle (1:57)

Okay.

Craig Carton (1:58)

B.

Thought playing football week after 9-11. Good idea, but would have gone either way had they decided not to play, which was interesting. And C. Got the hair plugs, knowing he was going to offend people like me.

Chris McMonigle (2:14)

Yeah.

Craig Carton (2:15)

Other bald people who looked up to him as our hero.

Chris McMonigle (2:19)

I can understand that. How does it look? It feels like it looks pretty good. It looks pretty good.

SPEAKER_3 (2:23)

There's a place in Chicago that does it. Yeah.

Craig Carton (2:25)

Because I'm like, how come I didn't see you on a plane, the turkey with blood in your head?

Chris McMonigle (2:28)

But I know how you feel because I had more than anything. Judge said last night, I had my biggest problem with Aaron Judge has always been, he fixed his teeth. He was one of us.

Craig Carton (2:37)

He's got them horse teeth now.

Chris McMonigle (2:38)

One of us gap tooth individuals.

Craig Carton (2:41)

Right.

Chris McMonigle (2:41)

And we were proud of it. And he got it fixed.

Craig Carton (2:45)

Yeah.

Chris McMonigle (2:45)

How many dentists I've had to tell?

Craig Carton (2:47)

That you're good with your luck.

Chris McMonigle (2:48)

Keep your hands off my teeth.

Craig Carton (2:50)

Yeah.

Chris McMonigle (2:50)

You don't need to fix it.

Craig Carton (2:51)

Because they work.

Chris McMonigle (2:51)

It's me. It's who I am at this point.

Craig Carton (2:53)

Because why would you have to get a veneer on top of both of them or something?

SPEAKER_3 (2:57)

I don't either. I thought of that.

Chris McMonigle (2:57)

My teeth are perfect. That's why every dentist always says it. They're like, if you just fix that, you'd have one of the great mouths in history.