Why Is My Mom Already Talking About My Pregnancy Weight?

Dr. Naomi Bernstein (0:00)

This is the hard part, is like I think with parents, there's always this little fantasy that somehow they're gonna be the parents that you wish that you had.

Jordana Abraham (0:13)

A quick note before we get into the episode, Oversharing is a podcast for entertainment purposes only. It is not a medical podcast and does not constitute medical or psychological advice. Always seek the advice of your physician or mental health professional. Hello, and welcome back to the Oversharing podcast. I'm Jordana Abraham.

Dr. Naomi Bernstein (0:31)

And I am Dr. Naomi Bernstein.

Jordana Abraham (0:34)

How are you doing? I had such a good night of sleep last night, I feel.

Dr. Naomi Bernstein (0:39)

You did.

Jordana Abraham (0:40)

I went to sleep at like 9.15.

It was great. And the girls didn't wake up until 7

Dr. Naomi Bernstein (0:52)

Oh, right. It was excellent.

Jordana Abraham (0:56)

Yes. A whole new person.

Dr. Naomi Bernstein (0:58)

You look great. I mean, I hear that all the time. Like I literally hear, I've told you this before from patients where they're like, I don't know what to do. I'm depressed. I'm anxious. I need help. I need medicine. I need therapy. And then they're like, oh wait, I just actually needed sleep the whole time.

Jordana Abraham (1:16)

It really can just change your whole life, I think.

Dr. Naomi Bernstein (1:21)

People don't know what to do. They're like ready to check in to a mental hospital. And then they're like, oh wait, all I needed was actual sleep.

Jordana Abraham (1:29)

But it's so hard because like sometimes you're like, you know that and then that almost makes it harder to sleep.

Dr. Naomi Bernstein (1:35)

Cause you just can't have it.

Jordana Abraham (1:36)

Cause right. Cause you can't have it. Or you're just kind of like, there's so much sleep pressure.

Dr. Naomi Bernstein (1:40)

Yeah.

Jordana Abraham (1:41)

Like, do you know what I mean? Like, and then you're like anxious that you're not going to sleep. And then what's going to happen if you don't sleep. So it's like a kind of weird mind fuck situation.

Dr. Naomi Bernstein (1:50)

Yeah, totally. Totally. Sometimes, I mean, this doesn't necessarily help, but sometimes I just tell patients to kind of just give up the fight and just say, I'm lying here now. I don't have to take care of anybody right now. I don't have, no one's asking me, or if it's work pressure, like, no one's asking me to do anything right now. I'm going to swish around in my sheets and just enjoy this quiet moment of not having to do anything right now. Even though I'm not sleeping, I'm going to just relax into this restful moment of nobody asking me for anything, even if, and just accept, okay, I'm not going to sleep.

Say, I'm not going to sleep. I'm going to stop trying.

Not going to sleep, but I'm just going to enjoy quiet rest with nothing to do. And no one bothering me, no one asking me for anything, and no tasks to be done. So I'm not going to even, I'm not going to, I'm going to give up on trying to sleep, but I'm just going to lie here and rest while awake. And sometimes that just takes a little bit of the pressure off.

Jordana Abraham (3:01)

I think that's the move.

Dr. Naomi Bernstein (3:02)

Yeah, give it a try.

Instead of just say, I'm not, just give it up. Not going to fall asleep.

Jordana Abraham (3:08)

Right.

Dr. Naomi Bernstein (3:08)

Stop trying.

Jordana Abraham (3:09)

Unless you're really tired and it just comes right to you and you have such a nice long sleep.

Dr. Naomi Bernstein (3:14)

Yes.

Jordana Abraham (3:15)

Not to brag. Sorry, guys. Not to brag.

Tomorrow night, I'm sure, will not be as good. Okay.

Dr. Naomi Bernstein (3:22)

So your alma mater was in the news. How did that feel?

Jordana Abraham (3:28)

Yeah. Not a great couple of weeks to be a Cornell alum.

Not super proud to be from there this week.

Dr. Naomi Bernstein (3:38)

For sure.

Jordana Abraham (3:39)

I mean, reading everything, it was just like, it was like horrific. Like I saw this article, I think a few weeks before it became like big. And I was like, you know, we were, I was talking about it with some friends who went there, my friends from college. And yeah, just the most disturbing part was that, like that Snapchat message was just really just.

Dr. Naomi Bernstein (4:03)

So it's not just the guys that were there. It was like all the guys that were complicit and the whole thing made it even more disturbing.