Turning a Struggling Irish School Back Into a Rugby Powerhouse | Sean Skehan

Sean Skehan (0:00)

Welcome to Coaching Culture.

Ben Herring (0:01)

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Sean Skehan (0:50)

My number one job is I'm a dad, you know, and that's the most important job. I got a 10 to that with the most focus. And then the coaching becomes second if you lean in to a performance challenge. You have no guarantee of outcome, right? It's going to be difficult. It's going to be really challenging. I think that's where all the good stuff happens in life. Every little small crumb that you bring to bear is just making us as a community stronger and better. You're never going to be this perfect coach where you think, you know, you have the solutions to all the problems and so on. Master the human side of building those relationships and getting people to a place that you want to go to, and then build the rugby side.

Ben Herring (1:26)

Welcome to Coaching Culture, the podcast about Colt event culture and leadership. I'm Ben Herring. I've been loving this side of the game for bloody ages. Today's guest is Sean Skehan from Tenure College in Ireland. Now Sean is a Dublin native attending another rugby powerhouse of Sid Michael's College.

Early in his days, he was director of rugby at Glenstil Abbey School, who won their first Munster Schools title in his time there. He then took over Tenure College RFC, the rugby football club, in 2019 to 2025 and took them on a seriously good AIL finals run. And he's made some seriously good rep coaching appointments along the way. Ireland Club 15 head coach, Leinster Schools head coach. And since 2025, he is the head coach of the Tenure College team, where they've reached their first Leinster School finals in 16 years. School is considered one of the traditional heavyweights of Leinster School rugby. And his current trajectory is firmly in the upwards direction. Sean is a way of revitalizing rugby programs and doing so at Tenure College. Sean, welcome to the Coaching Culture podcast.

Sean Skehan (2:39)

Thanks a million for having me on, Ben. I'm really looking forward to the chat.

Ben Herring (2:44)

Mate, it is a pleasure to have you.

We were talking about off air, just the nature of coaching. We've got two young kids at home, which is part of the coaching journey, is managing coaching games of rugby and a lot of rugby at that, and managing, in your case, a young family. How is that going for you?

Sean Skehan (3:02)

Yeah, tricky. Look, you've been there. Obviously, you've got four. I'm only with two.

Big shift, obviously. My youngest, or my eldest, rather, is two and a half. And when she came down the track, it just changes everything, your perspective on things. And probably I would be definitely guilty of carrying a lot of anxiety, both pre-games or after games, maybe more frustration after games when they don't go your way. And when it was just me and my wife, she kind of dealt with it. Or some days, if it came off a bad loss, it would be pretty grim. And we just can't do that. You come home, you walk in the door, and Harper doesn't care what's gone on in the match on the Saturday. So it's just trying to be better and more mindful, particularly of when you're home, you're home.

Probably, I think all rugby coaches are probably guilty of living in their own head a bit and constantly thinking about the next challenge or the next session or how we're gonna navigate this problem. And I think you have to park that a little bit when you have young kids at home and be able to be at home and be present at home. And it's still like I'm in no way perfect in that space. And if my wife was on the call, she'd have plenty of stuff, I'm sure she could note and say. But that's been the big change, just making it, I think coaches, for a lot of us, it becomes a huge part of our identity, a huge part of our day to day. And I suppose my number one job is I'm a dad. And that's the most important job. I got to tend to that with the most focus. And then the coaching becomes second to that. I think there's definitely some stuff that can overlap. Some experiences in coaching can help with parenting, but probably more so the other way. You know, the learning of the parenting process has probably helped massively in the coaching side of things and probably made me a lot more relaxed and more, I suppose, particularly when you're dealing with young people, more mindful of those young people from a parent's hat, whereas they used to just be a rugby performance hat and trying to get that balance a little bit better than I probably had it before I had the girls.