Top 10 Signs You're in a Manipulative Relationship | Rick Alan Ross - PT 1 (Fan Fave)

**Rick Alan Ross** (0:00)
Best thing that's ever happened to you financially, go. Easy, sold my car on Carvana, amazing offer. Really? I hit 200 on a scratcher.

**Lisa Bilyeu** (0:08)
Did the scratcher come to your house and hand you a check?

**Rick Alan Ross** (0:10)
No. How many scratchers did you hit to get that? I hit a button on carvana.com once. Okay, that's fair.

**Lisa Bilyeu** (0:17)
It's like the lottery, except you always win.

**Rick Alan Ross** (0:20)
Not like the lottery at all, actually. Exactly, inexplicably good.

**Lisa Bilyeu** (0:25)
Offer's worth bragging about. Sell your car today on Carvana. Pick up these may apply.
What up, guys? This is your homie, Lisa Bilyeu here. And today, we're diving into a mind-blowing conversation that has me sitting on the edge of my seat. Now, a lot of us women deal with heavy, deep, emotional, mental manipulation. And I cover a lot on this podcast about the signs and how we start to navigate when we're being manipulated, controlled, or someone's trying to get our power. That's just something that I've struggled with my whole life. I know how many women have also felt like that. Now, when someone takes away your power, there's no way you can have confidence, which is why I find it fascinating. Because the time in my life that I felt the least confident is when I gave my power over. Now, how the hell does that happen? Well, today, I have a guy on that is going to help us understand not just manipulation tactics, but the master, the master class of manipulation. And it comes from someone that not only can manipulate one woman or one person, it's the person that has the skills to be able to manipulate and control possibly hundreds, if not thousands of people. Now, yes, I'm talking about cult leaders. When you think about the tactics that we talk about on this show, cult leaders are the people that just take it to the nth degree. And how the hell are they able to have so much power over so many people? Well, that's what we're diving into today with the legendary Rick Alan Ross, who is the leading cult profiler. And now he's dedicated his life to helping identify cults, identify cult leaders and help de-program the mental impact that cults and cult leaders who are master manipulators have on us. So we go deep into the psychology of manipulation. We talk about how cult leaders gain the control over their followers and then the subtle, slow red flags that can actually warn you or people around you before it's too late. Guys, trust me, you do not want to miss this for a frickin second. I found it utterly fascinating. And there are so many nuggets of gold of wisdom that we can take and use on our daily life. So let's jump in right now with Rick Alan Ross. I'm your host, Lisa Bilyeu, and this is Women of Impact.

**Rick Alan Ross** (2:53)
I think we're susceptible to anyone who we perceive in a positive light because they seem to be kind, they seem to be understanding, they like us, they love us, or they say they do, and we want to like them back. So it's been called love bombing. You initially become involved with someone or a group, and they just shower you with what seems to be unconditional love and attention, and you feel good, and you also feel like, I owe it to this person who is being so kind and loving to acquiesce to their suggestions, their requests, to get into the car, to get more involved in the group, to go out on more dates and begin a relationship. But here's the magic word, no.
You just say that to them about one of their requests. They say, well, would you do this? Would you do this? No.
And you stick with no.
And you see how conditional their attention, their affection is actually in real time. Because what you're saying is, do you still love me? Do you still care for me? Do you still like me when I don't do what you want me to do? How does this new love in my life talk about his exes? Does he say, you know, I made some mistakes and I wish I had handled that better, but I didn't. And maybe this time I'll be better. And I'm still friends with my ex. You know, I still care about her. I still talk to her from time to time. I'm still friends with her family. Or do they say, she was totally wrong. I never talk with her. You know, what a bitch. You know, I don't have anything to do with her. So, do they really love you? Do they really care about you? Or is that highly conditional affection and love that is based on your compliance? Whether you're in an abusive, controlling relationship or you're in a destructive cult, there's a sense I can never be good enough. No matter what I do, I'm broken, I need to be fixed. And that engenders dependency upon the leader or the partner to fix you.