"This Man is WAY Darker Than a Psychopath" 8 Manipulation Tricks He'll Use to F*ck With Your Head

Daniel Jones (0:00)

A lot of times, I get challenged, what's the difference between a psychopath and a Machiavellian? What did they do that's so different from a psychopath? My answer is Machiavellians are so dangerous because they're thinking 10 steps ahead. So if they're engaging in this strategic deception, they're impossible to detect.

Lisa Bilyeu (0:16)

And when you even say least detectable, I believe you said that you knew someone who had been married to a Machiavellian for 10 years and they didn't even know him.

Daniel Jones (0:24)

Correct. So we actually did a study in our laboratory looking at attraction to serial killers, attraction to violence. Oh, did you? Yes, we did. And what we found was that three types of people were attracted to antisocial characters.

The first was...

Lisa Bilyeu (0:43)

As one of the leading experts in dark personalities, you say the one we should fear the most isn't the narcissist and it isn't even the psychopath. There's a third type, one that most of us women haven't even heard of. So for every single person listening right now who wants to make damn sure that we never fall for this type of man, what is it?

Daniel Jones (1:02)

So Machiavellianism is the most dangerous because they're the least detectable.

Machiavellian individuals, if they are intelligent, which there's no correlation between any dark personality trait and intelligence, but if you have somebody who is Machiavellian, what that means is they're not going to trust anybody. So they're out of the gate, cynical, dispositionally, skeptical, and they don't share personal information, they don't share secrets, and they're very closed off with their private life. But they will get you talking. They will cultivate as much information about you as they can. They will seem friendly, seem forthcoming about their intentions. Their manipulation fundamentally differs from that of psychopaths or narcissists because they only lie when they feel it's necessary. Machiavellian individuals, however, will strategically lie. They will omit information. They will engage in deception that covers their tracks. That is, he said, she said, plausible deniability, backroom conversation, so that they can't be implicated, at least on paper. And then the most important thing about a Machiavellian individual is their caution. So a lot of times I get challenged, what's the difference between a psychopath and a Machiavellian? What did they do that's so different from a psychopath? My answer is nothing. It's when they do it that makes them different from a psychopath. Psychopathic individuals have impulsivity deficits, where they are heavily impulsive, they live an erratic lifestyle, they are slaves to their immediate gratification. They jump on something if they want to do it, regardless of the consequences down the road. Machiavellians are so dangerous because they're thinking down the road, and they're thinking 10 steps ahead. So if they're thinking 10 steps ahead and they're engaging in this strategic deception, they're impossible to detect, but they build coalitions. They'll gossip behind your back. They'll find information and use it at the right time, 3 months, 3 years later. So in terms of a long-term deep impact on somebody, Machiavellianism is by far the most dangerous and the least detectable.

Lisa Bilyeu (3:01)

Wow!

It sounds very cunning. And when you even say least detectable, I believe you've said that you knew someone who had been married to a Machiavellian for 10 years and they didn't even know it.

Daniel Jones (3:12)

Correct. Actually, I think that number was higher. I think it was 20 years or higher. Oh, God! Yes. I've had several cases that I've consulted on. I remember this gentleman called me. His partner was a high-level executive at a tech company.

And it was revealed to him over 20 years that within the first three months, she was cheating on him and he had no idea.

She also had cultivated bank accounts that were private, offshore, detached from the marriage. So, he was unable to access assets that were supposed to be marital and joint assets, finding out, discovering the infidelity. When finally the cat was out of the bag of the infidelity, she grinned. But the reason this gentleman contacted me is because his lawyers wouldn't believe him.

Lisa Bilyeu (4:00)

Wow!

Daniel Jones (4:01)

They said, there's no way you could have not known for 20 years. And I had to step in and discuss how Machiavellianism is.

Lisa Bilyeu (4:09)

So, explain to me then in that situation, was that the very first time you ever saw callousness in her? Because I would assume in 20 years, you would see moments of callousness either between you and her or the way that she responds to other people, strangers, friends.

Daniel Jones (4:23)

In my conversations with him, it sounds like she did a good enough job to hide the callousness. And then love, emotional connection, takes over and allows you to delete things that were marginal, and you give your partner the benefit of the doubt. So, could he revisionist history go back 2020 in hindsight and say, oh, yes, there was, yeah, of course, there were leaky things throughout the relationship that would occur. The issue, though, is that when we love someone, we trust someone, we take them at their word, and we should.