The Ringer Fantasy Football League Live Draft

**SPEAKER_1** (0:00)
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**Danny Heifetz** (1:00)
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Welcome to The Ringer Fantasy Football Live Draft powered by Verizon and wow, what a voice cracker.
Do we have to give them their money back?
All right, Verizon, I'll get you back for that later. Hit me up.
My name is Danny Heifetz. I am joined here by Chris Ryan, Sean Fennessey, Dave Cheng, Joe House, Cousin Sal, Bill Simmons, Craig Horlbeck, Danny Kelly, Tate Frazier, Van Lathan, and Mallory Rubin. And we have a great draft here where almost nobody else's voice is going to crack for the rest of the show. And we have some wrinkles ready here, including, you'll notice, no technology, no phones, no laptops. It's per Mallory Rubin's request.

**Mallory Rubin** (3:05)
I just think that this is fascistic and shameful, and contrary to the spirit of the exercise.

**Danny Heifetz** (3:10)
Fascistic, that sounds like fascistic, but it's fine.

**Cousin Sal** (3:13)
Well, that's the branch.

**Danny Heifetz** (3:16)
I get why you're mad, because you came in first place. You won last year despite all the complaining.

**Mallory Rubin** (3:21)
But unlike you, I like to think about other people and what is best for the corrective.

**Danny Heifetz** (3:25)
Well, I'm glad you said that, because speaking of thinking of other people, and this makes it a little awkward. We actually do have something for you, Mallory.

**Mallory Rubin** (3:31)
Oh, you're going to acknowledge my title?

**Bill Simmons** (3:33)
All right.

**Danny Heifetz** (3:33)
So Mallory, you did win. So we actually did get you something.

**Bill Simmons** (3:37)
There we go.

**Cousin Sal** (3:40)
I can't give her a man like a co-op person.

**SPEAKER_7** (3:50)
It's a giant head bug.

**SPEAKER_8** (3:54)
I think it's a trophy.

**Mallory Rubin** (3:56)
I'm gonna ignore what Bill said, here we go.

**Van Lathan** (4:10)
It's a cup.

**Bill Simmons** (4:10)
Yeah, you have to.

**Van Lathan** (4:12)
So like you. Every year, whoever wins gets to put on a sign Stanley Cup.

**Danny Heifetz** (4:16)
And it's going to be a Stanley Cup where she has it for a year and then assuming this league doesn't collapse and everyone kill us, then you're going to give it back and you'll name it on it and get it for you.

**Bill Simmons** (4:24)
You'll be able to drink two cans of cold soup. I was going to say, if a man wins, no one's going to want it.

**Cousin Sal** (4:30)
And also, there are no bathroom breaks in that.

**Bill Simmons** (4:32)
Thanks, guys.

**Joe House** (4:32)
Exactly.

**Bill Simmons** (4:36)
Wonderfully nice. Thanks, guys. I like that guy charged to the leader.

**Joe House** (4:40)
I appreciate it.

**Danny Heifetz** (4:42)
Actually, Crystal Images gave us a discount, so don't worry. The other wrinkle here, in addition to the new technology by Mallory's request, is we have the Pick Your Own Punishment. We're bringing Pick Your Own Punishment back, which again, everyone's so happy about it.