The Relationship You're Praying for Is Also Praying for You

**Matthew Gottesman** (0:02)
Welcome to The Niche Is You. My name is Matt Gottesman, at Matt Gottesman on Instagram, and this is my daily podcast where I create short, quick hitting episodes to help you uncomplicate life, creativity, and the pursuit of your highest self. There's only main character energy here. Now let's get into it.
Welcome to episode 807, the relationship you're praying for is also praying for you. That's right. This is not a one-sided event at all. Someone else is being prepared on the other end of your faith. That is sometimes hard to believe when you are deeply in it. You're doing all the things on your own. You're in the work. You're trusting in an unknown amount of time. You're letting go of control. You're making better decisions. You're not necessarily, you know, like you're out there, but with God, right? And so sometimes you may think it's a one player event.
Your person is doing the same. That's why I think two people who have individual relationships with God is so important, because then you're learning some fundamentals long before you ever meet, or short before you ever meet. Who knows? God's timing speeds up when we get out of the way. But you praying and them praying means that when you're in the relationship, you'll continue to do that for each other and for yourselves throughout the process. Right? So in this episode, I want to talk about why the waiting season in love isn't just about your preparation. It's about theirs too. What does that look like? How God is simultaneously preparing two people for each other without either of them knowing the full picture. That's how we also learn faith, right? How do we actually learn faith for ourselves? Because we bring that energy into a partnership. How do you feel so sturdy and steady? I have faith. Where did it come from? Well, actually, I spent a lot of time with God before I met you. Makes sense.
And also, while your faith during the wait is connected to something happening on the other side that you can't see yet. Our prayers matter. You ever feel like when your family or your mother, your father, or your friends pray over you, and you receive that, and you don't even know about the prayers that you're receiving from them sometimes. And then all of a sudden, like, something happens in your life, and like you tell your friend, your parent, whoever, and they're like, Oh, my God, I prayed that for you. Prayers are always working for you. Your prayers are always working for them, too. Also, how trust in the process changes your relationship with the waiting itself, you detach from the outcome. You also start to see a bigger picture emerging. You play a whole different game. Also, I want to talk about why the preparation happening in you right now is making you ready for the kind of love most people only pray about.
Right? And what it means to hold faith for something that's being built in two places at once. Think about that. Think about the energy that goes into it. Think about, like, the love and the fortitude and the fire and forge for it, right? Like, you're actively working towards something. What do you think that that's going to do for your life? Right? So, let's jump right into it. You've been praying for the relationship consistently, faithfully, sometimes probably impatiently, you know? Maybe in that waiting, you've wondered, is there anybody on the other end of it? Yeah, there is. When you're really in the game, when you're really in the game of this whole thing and you're, like, praying with God and, you know, you're not the only one. Think about that. Why would you be the only one?
Right? But it's possible to think, like, are you the only one walking towards the same thing? Are they being prepared the way you're being prepared? Are they praying the way you pray? Are they going through the same pains that you're going through? What's their seasons like? You know, or are they even going through any season? Do they even think about me? Yeah, they do. Two connected souls think about each other. Two connected souls are being prepared. They're just going through different paths. To get to each other. And I think that that's the beauty of praying before they even arrive. Not to necessarily call them in for you, but to cover their path. Because that's something you're going to want to continue doing long after you meet. But it's not a one-player sport. This is a two-player game. So let's jump into the first one. You've been thinking the wait is only about you. Most people experience the waiting season in love as a solo journey, as if God is only working on them. But what if the preparation has always been happening in two places at once? When you're in the waiting, it feels deeply personal and deeply solitary. You might be the only one going through this. They don't even exist out there. No, if it's been placed in your heart, they exist. If it's been placed in... That's why I talk a lot about what God places in your heart, the desires in your heart from God. Now, obviously, we try to act them out through our own will often, of course, because we're like, oh, it's been placed in my heart. I clearly want these things. Let me go make it happen. And we, as humans, do everything possible to make it happen. Well, what if, instead, you prayed over it, worked with God on it, and then the fact of the matter is that when you do that, it's personal to you, and you're in kind of a quiet season. It's just you. Your season of singleness is just you. And that could be very solitary, very humbling, because you're just like, there's no way. Like, God can do anything, but it's like, you know, I was talking to a friend of mine, who's also like a mentor to me, and we were catching up last week, and he was telling me about before he met his wife, and he was saying how, you know, he went on the dates and he met really great women, but he just knew that they weren't his wife, and he was just like, no, I'm just gonna keep walking with God, but he got to a place of a little bit of discouragement. He was spending some time alone with himself and with God, and he was like, who could possibly understand me? Who could possibly put up with my passionate ways? Who could possibly put up with, you know, how I do things? And he was feeling more like, and even though the people he had met were great, there wasn't anything wrong with them. He just knew that they weren't for him. And so he was pleading with God, like who could possibly understand me at the level that, you know, he was feeling discouraged. And then lo and behold, he met his wife. And it's funny because I remember the first time I met her, I was like, oh yeah, that's your wife. That is your wife. It just made sense. Right? So in our season of waiting, we can sometimes, in solitary, be like, how could possibly God design someone very specific? Well, of course God can. So we pray over them before they get here. You assume maybe God's just working on you and refining you and preparing you, and I do believe that's true, but I think, do we rarely consider that the same process is happening to somebody else because we're so in it about ourselves?