"Seth Meyers"

Sean P. Hayes (0:05)

I've heard this for years, being in the Hollywood business that for every 100 auditions, you'll book one job, so just keep going and keep going. And I thought, gosh, for every 100 episodes of SmartLess, there's always one good one. So we got about three in the can.

Guys, guess what's coming up in a couple weeks?

Will Arnett (0:44)

Yeah, yeah, I know, we gotta mention, we gotta mention the listener.

Sean P. Hayes (0:45)

Oh my God, the Hollywood Bowl. We're gonna be at the Hollywood Bowl October 17th.

Will Arnett (0:51)

And not just there, like not hanging out, actually doing a show at the Hollywood Bowl.

Jason Bateman (0:54)

Stage, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Sean P. Hayes (0:55)

And if you don't have tickets yet, you go to smartless.com/live, is that right?

Jason Bateman (0:59)

Wait, what is it?

Sean P. Hayes (1:01)

smartless.com/live.

Jason Bateman (1:04)

Oh my gosh, that's pretty easy. And for that, they're gonna get a double guest, is that right?

Will Arnett (1:09)

Yep.

Jason Bateman (1:10)

Two guests.

Will Arnett (1:11)

And we got some fun surprises.

Sean P. Hayes (1:13)

Yeah. Really?

Will Arnett (1:14)

Yeah, we got some fun surprises.

Jason Bateman (1:16)

All for the price of one ticket.

Sean P. Hayes (1:18)

Yeah, all for the price of one ticket.

Jason Bateman (1:19)

And a nice, beautiful October, October 17th, right? A fall night out there under the stars.

Will Arnett (1:24)

It's gonna be gorgeous. And yeah, you buy a ticket, and you can't put a price tag on a smile.

Jason Bateman (1:30)

What a great sell. Will, you're the best. Anyway, it's gonna be a great night, hopefully as great as this next guest coming up. Guys, let's get to the episode.

You can hear me now?

Sean P. Hayes (1:45)

There he is.

Jason Bateman (1:46)

Listen, listener and guest, I'm so sorry.

Will Arnett (1:49)

You spent all night on your computer in incognito mode for we don't know why, but we just don't.

Jason Bateman (1:55)

I had to change all my settings and all my usernames.

Sean P. Hayes (1:59)

Sorry.

Will Arnett (2:03)

If you got hacked, it would be the most boring hack for a hacker. It would just be all baseball stats.

Sean P. Hayes (2:08)

And list of like movie stuff. Yeah.

Jason Bateman (2:12)

And you know, when I get all the cookie alerts, you know, would you like to reject all cookies or whatnot?

And I do. I do reject them. I know Sean, you don't.

Will Arnett (2:21)

Quick question, Sean, have you ever?

Jason Bateman (2:23)

God be, yeah.

But I don't have any secrets. And you know, so like my instinct is to accept the cookies because then I don't get ads for things that I don't need. You know, like skin rashes and things like that. I get ads for.

Will Arnett (2:47)

JB, but you don't have secrets, but you used to be, there was a time where you were just built on secrets.

Jason Bateman (2:53)

Yeah.

Well, I think I was doing things at a time when we didn't have phones and things to photograph us. And even then I wasn't, I was never a bad boy. It's so boring. Even my bad days were boring.

Will Arnett (3:11)

When you say bad boy, like the idea of you like in a leather jacket and then you flip the collar up, you know.

Jason Bateman (3:18)

Or like could you imagine me ever trying to like mix it up with like a paparazzi guy that gets too close to my face and I take a swing at him like Sean Penn. And then I just get my ass beaten, you know, repeatedly.

Will Arnett (3:28)

I can see, I could actually see that. Wait, have you ever owned a leather jacket quickly either of you?

Sean P. Hayes (3:34)

Of course, yeah. Yeah, I have.

Jason Bateman (3:36)

But they were soft and suede. They weren't even like manly.

Sean P. Hayes (3:40)

Lamb skin. Mine was lamb skin back in the 80s.

Will Arnett (3:44)

No, no, no, I'm saying leather jacket.

Sean P. Hayes (3:45)

Yeah. Oh, I see.

Jason Bateman (3:46)

Okay. I think I had like a veal skin vest.

That had velcro closers on it.

Will Arnett (3:58)

Tonight we got a beautiful veal skin. What else do we got? Chef is preparing a beautiful veal skin.

Jason Bateman (4:04)

Yeah. Now, Will, I feel like it's been a while since you've had an update on your love life and domestic life.

Will Arnett (4:13)

Oh, yeah.

Sean P. Hayes (4:14)

What's going on there? We always talk about Sean and I's personal life.