Neal Brennan: A Joke About Alcohol

Neal Brennan (0:05)

I'm not mad at any of these drugs. MDMA, psilocybin, weed, all pass the FDA hurdles for safety. But you know what wouldn't pass the FDA hurdles for safety? I was thinking about it. Alcohol. For safety? Like, if they tested alcohol, like whiskey, in a lab, 100 men, 100 women, scientists fencing it, marking down the results, they go to their boss the next day and be like, all right, sir, we did the whiskey test. First one or two drinks, people seem warm and happy. And then around the third drink, a lot of the men became belligerent. And the women were upset, but they said they didn't want to talk about it. And then a lot of people vomited and passed out, and everyone who drove home crashed their car. You gotta be like, that sounds awful. You'd be like, I know, here's the crazy part. They all want to come back and get on Saturday. And they're wondering if we're gonna hire a DJ? And two Israeli guys want to promote it?

So clearly, I'm not a big drinker. The fucked up thing about alcohol is it gets so much good PR. Like, ever since I was a kid, I've always heard like, when you drink, your real self comes out. Which is true to a point. Like, maybe one or two drinks. But I've never looked at one of my sloshed friends and been like, there's the real Tony.

you guys. That is his god-given essence right there.

The real Tony has to piss on the street. Watch Neal Brennan blocks only on Netflix.