Mommy, Mommy, Mommy... Why? Why? Why? Getting Unstuck From Annoying Behaviors

Janet Lansbury (0:00)

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Janet Lansbury (1:50)

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Hi, this is Janet Lansbury. Welcome to Unruffled.

Today, I'm going to be addressing a common concern. It's actually a whole category of concerns that I hear about a lot. And I remember from my own parenting, and that is when children seem stuck in annoying behaviors. A really common example is a child repeatedly asking something, saying something. Often this is even just saying, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy. And that starts to be like a parent's least favorite word to hear, because it feels like a call to action, as do other behaviors like children doing a lot of baby talk, or wanting to hang on you, or whining. And really almost any behavior under the sun that we find is wearing us down because it keeps flaring up and it's annoying. There's a way that we can look at this, a way that we can care for ourselves, that will almost always put an end to these kinds of behaviors.

To illustrate, here's a note that I recently received. This is a message that came on Instagram.

Hi, Janet. My husband and I were just talking about our four-year-old. She has had a life full of so many transitions. She's the queen of conquering hard things. With that being said, she's a powerful little thing. She's done all the challenging phases of toddlerhood and never really paved the way as the firstborn to an easy way to parent. Speaking to your recent podcast, she used to be afraid of everything too. Vacuums, loud noises, sensory tactile stimulation like sand, baths, strangers, and so much more. Some things were stemmed from really scary things like seeing a lady fall in public and injure her wrist badly and needing an ambulance to come, or watching an older lady stumble out of a bus. Crazy scenarios to happen back to back. She's also had two baby brothers born in her lifespan, and she's lived in two different states. What a life.

All this to say she's overcome so much and we are so proud. She loves to dance, sing, play, and talk. Our issue lately is her repeating the same question over and over again. We start the day off trying to make sure breakfast is made because otherwise she's demanding the whole morning for me to do step-by-step what her breakfast routine is. I need oatmeal, I need milk, I need peanut butter. Can I have OJ?