Topics: Comedy
**Ethan Klein** (0:00)
In five, four, three, two.
**Ethan Klein** (0:12)
Welcome back to True Tues, my word. Welcome to True Tuesday.
**Harley** (0:21)
Wagwan with True Tues, grody.
**Ethan Klein** (0:22)
Wagwan, grody. It's the weirdly Canadian True Crime Show, everyone.
**Harley** (0:31)
Where we only talk about Utah.
**Ethan Klein** (0:35)
Yeah.
And now today, Massachusetts. Shout out.
**Harley** (0:40)
More like massive, huge tits. Dump them out. Am I right?
**Ethan Klein** (0:45)
Got them.
**Harley** (0:46)
For anyone joining the show, we got new viewers. Dump them out. We're referring to tits.
**Ethan Klein** (0:51)
Yeah. Dumping your boobs out.
Usually from a bathing suit or a bra. In celebration.
**Harley** (0:59)
Why do I? And that's doing stuff. Yeah. We talk about doing a little bit over here.
**Ethan Klein** (1:08)
Do the other dude one now.
Thank you. Thank you. Yeah.
**Harley** (1:20)
Harley is up right now.
**Ethan Klein** (1:22)
Harley's hoping we're getting new fans and he's trying to catch everybody up on the law.
**Harley** (1:25)
Yeah. I didn't want to be scared because at the end of the last episode, I feel like it turned into like a weird horror movie.
**Ethan Klein** (1:33)
Yeah. So in another timeline, if you missed last night, our episode last night, my lights and my monitor turned off.
**Harley** (1:46)
We got a theory cooking that she wanted to leave early and didn't want to talk about any of the next topics. So she sabotaged. Yeah, just because you were like, you were like, Oh no, my power is out. And it's true. Everything went dark. But we're like, we still hear you and see you.
**Ethan Klein** (2:01)
I is that weird?
**Harley** (2:01)
I you're like, Oh God, I guess it's the end of the show.
**Ethan Klein** (2:04)
Bye guys. Well, what a shame. Yeah, I was so weirded out because I had my headphones on. I was like, Oh fuck. And then I realized I could still hear you guys. And then I was so confused. Of course, it was not.
It was not a power outage. I thought it may be a fuse blue. Turns out my badass orange cat was in here. I usually lock him out for the episodes. Shout out Orange Julius, AKA Juju.
**SPEAKER_6** (2:32)
And he was that a noise or David?
**Ethan Klein** (2:37)
That was a sound.
**Harley** (2:38)
That was one of the sample sound effects sounded so much like you sound like a lot like you on the microphone. I still kind of believe it was you on the microphone.
**Ethan Klein** (2:47)
Yeah, we have a Karen Read retrial juror in the audience today. That's cool.
**Ethan Klein** (2:53)
Oh, wait. I also I have this one, too.
**Harley** (2:58)
Oh, I know about that one.
**Ethan Klein** (3:00)
So anyway, it was my cat. It was my cat who did it. And that means everything's OK.
People, if you were concerned that I can't pay my light bill, things like that, that's not the case. It was literally my cat being an orange cat. And now he has he has been sequestered from this room. And we are ready to kick him out forever. Yeah, he's done.
**Harley** (3:23)
You like orange cats?
**Ethan Klein** (3:25)
I love my orange baby.
**SPEAKER_6** (3:26)
He's always they're always boys.
**Ethan Klein** (3:28)
They're almost always. Yep.
**Harley** (3:30)
Yep.
**Ethan Klein** (3:30)
Yep. Yep.
**Harley** (3:32)
He's like you're you like your cats like you like your podcast co-hosts.
**Ethan Klein** (3:38)
Men.
**Harley** (3:39)
Men. That guy.
**Ethan Klein** (3:41)
Crazy men.
**SPEAKER_7** (3:42)
I don't know what we're going to do with those men.
**Harley** (3:44)
Me, David and that cat were like men, men, men.
**Ethan Klein** (3:47)
My man cat.
**Harley** (3:49)
Orange Julius building the sewers.
**Ethan Klein** (3:53)
I love him so much. But he is a fucking nightmare.
**Harley** (3:58)
You want to drown him?
**Ethan Klein** (3:59)
No.
**Harley** (4:00)
You don't love him that much. I love my dog. Hold them both down in the water.
**Ethan Klein** (4:04)
I want to put him in a bag. I want to put him in a bag.
**Harley** (4:07)
Or what? Fucking spin it and launch it into space.
**Ethan Klein** (4:10)
Yeah.
**Harley** (4:11)
Or like throw it into a hole.
**Ethan Klein** (4:13)
Yeah. Ooh, maybe the hole. Or maybe, yeah, or maybe bag then drown, which is really how they killed a lot of cats back in the day.
**Harley** (4:21)
You know, the world would be perfect if they, if there was a hole, a gape, if you will.
**Ethan Klein** (4:27)
Sure, a crevasse.
**Harley** (4:29)
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