Jeff Arcuri: A Joke Big Mouth Billy Bass

**Jeff Arcuri** (0:03)
I feel like we had this, you're 42, I'm 38 We had the same shit, we had the same childhood for the most part, right? You had like a Furby.
I wanted one. You wanted one. Well, guess what? Look under your seat, buddy.

**SPEAKER_2** (0:19)
Ha ha.

**Jeff Arcuri** (0:23)
Wouldn't that be the cutest thing in the world?

**SPEAKER_2** (0:24)
He's like, oh my god.

**Jeff Arcuri** (0:29)
You had Tamagotchi, right? Yeah, that was fun. She still has one? That's gotta be annoying. Uh, wow. Dude, there was a toy, I don't know if you remember. It came out in the year 2000 I don't know if you had it. I don't know if you guys had this. It was called Big Mouth Billy Bass. Do you guys remember? Dude, okay, let me explain. Let me explain. Let me explain. It was this animatronic fish you put on the wall. I can hear you all explaining it to each other right now. I can hear all the men going, oh, let me take this one over for you, Jeff. Yeah, come here, honey. It was a fish on a wall.
It was this fish on a wall, and what happened is, if you press the button or you walk past it, it would activate it, and the tail would start wagging on the fish, and the music would start playing, and then during the chorus of the song, he would fucking look at you.
And then he went back to being a fish, and I remember when the battery started to die on Big Mouth Billy Bass, the only drop in quality before completely died is when he went to go sing the chorus of the song, his speech would slow down. Just for the scores, and it scared the shit out of me as a kid. The first song was Take Me To The River, and this is exactly how it sounded when the guys were dying. It would be like this, it would be like, I wanna know, can you help me, how to love again?

**SPEAKER_2** (1:54)
Take me to the river. Drop me.

**Jeff Arcuri** (2:12)
And I'm 12, like Billy, Billy. Do you know what he sounded like? I don't know if you guys remember this. Do you remember this movie, brother? Do you remember Silence of the Lambs? Is Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs is exactly how it sounded. The put the lotion, put the lotion in the basket. That guy, it sounded so much like Buffalo Bill. I'm not even kidding around right now. Tell me how much he sounds like Buffalo Bill with this second song. I'm serious. Tell me. I swear to God. This is exactly how it sounded when the badger died. It's crazy. The second song is Don't Worry, Be Happy.
I love that song.
Tell me how much he sounds like Buffalo Bill, not even kidding. Here's a little song I wrote. You might want to sing it note for note.

**SPEAKER_2** (3:10)
Would you fuck me? Cause I'd fuck me.

**Jeff Arcuri** (3:21)
And then he tucked his little fish dick in.
I stopped. You guys are so nice. Watch Jeff Arcuri, Nice To Meet You, only on Netflix.