I Thought I’d Met The One… Then He Threatened To Kill Me | Love Bombing, Coercive Control & Domestic Abuse

**Shauna** (0:00)
His mom should have swallowed, but she knows that too. Like, he's just the worst type of a human being. I met what I thought was a real life Prince Charming. And obviously when I say that, now we know that's a huge red flag. His family cooperated some of these lies. Prince, I don't believe he was single at all when I met him. He was welcomed in, he was treated like a grandson, he was treated like a son. I cannot believe you have started this marriage on a lie. He's crying, he's begging, he's pleading. He claimed he was going to therapy, he was swatting his life out, so he's been arrested and cautioned. He looks me up and down and goes, what is your jaw broken?
But we just got married, you can't call it quits on this already. One of the most sinister forms of manipulation is you can't see it, it doesn't leave a mark. It's that confusion that would keep you stuck. So he deleted all his social media, got rid of his phone. At this point, I was actually afraid to answer the postman. So this pub becomes very important to the story. I think he's having an affair with a girl. I'm a girl's girl, but I'm just going to say, I didn't think she was much to look at. It was going to be our first baby, and it was supposed to be a whole thing. And I miscarried a week later.
So whatever was in that pub, he would rather literally, potentially, catch an assault charge than let me know what was in there. There's nothing left of me. I'm as good as dead on the inside. I said, he's not going to be in this fucking video. My friend is like, let's give it a chance. So I decided to go home. Big mistake. He said to me that if he thought he'd get away with it, he'd kill me. She would be smart enough to figure out what would happen to me. He's demonic looking. He's black in the eyes. As the judge called him a danger to me, a danger to her, meaning the new girlfriend up in the, sitting in the gallery. I learned the law inside out. I learned defenses. Leaving might seem scary, but staying will only end one way. You're only coming out with it in a body bag. And that's the truth. It's a privilege to survive.

**Hana** (1:55)
Hello, and welcome to Becoming Lucy with me, Hana.

**Lucy Hodgkinson** (1:59)
And me, Lucy. So, sometimes the person lying next to you in bed isn't always the person you think they are.
Sometimes the biggest betrayal isn't just infidelity or lies, it's realizing the person you trusted with your future was living an entirely different life behind your back.

**Hana** (2:21)
Yes, today's episode starts with what looked like a normal love story, a wedding, a marriage, a future together. Within weeks, the letters started arriving. Secret debt, hidden finances, unpaid taxes, and slowly, the man behind the mask started to unravel.

**Lucy Hodgkinson** (2:40)
But what makes this story so frightening is that it didn't stop with just the lies. What followed was co-hersive control, manipulation, physio- God, I can't speak today.

**Hana** (2:53)
Physiological.

**Lucy Hodgkinson** (2:54)
Physiological, yeah. Abuse and eventually violence that left today's guest generally fearing for her life.

**Hana** (3:04)
And one moment in particular, has honestly stayed with us after reading her notes. It's about standing trapped in a bathroom and able to escape, looking into the eyes of the person that she loved and realizing, I might not survive this.

**Lucy Hodgkinson** (3:18)
And the scary thing is so many abusive relationships don't begin with obvious violence. They begin subtly guilt control, walking on eggshells, feeling responsible for somebody else's emotions and basically questioning your own reality.
And I think that's why today, this conversation is gonna be one that resonates with so many people listening.

**Hana** (3:46)
Yes, because today isn't just about domestic abuse. It's about intuition, identity, manipulation, shame, survival and rebuilding yourself after discovering life you thought you had was never real to begin with.

**Lucy Hodgkinson** (4:03)
And after everything that she survived, today's guest has now turned her pain into purpose. She uses social media to educate others on coercive control, domestic abuse, and the warning signs she wishes she recognized sooner. So today, we're joined by Shauna. So thanks for joining us.

**Shauna** (4:24)
Oh my god, no, thank you for having me on. This is fantastic. It's so exciting.

**Hana** (4:28)
We're so grateful that you're sharing your story with us. And let us apologize for our mishap of words in the intro. We're so missing ourselves all over the place. It's the hit, isn't it, Lucy?