How Soul-Level Patterns, Worthiness & Visibility Shape Your Success (And How To Rewrite Them)

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Junaid Ahmed (1:00)

Thank you for tuning in to Hacks and Hobbies with your host, Junaid. We're visited by our amazing guests coming from all walks of life who want to learn their story, their struggles and their journey on how they got to where they are today. So stick around.

In part one, Donna said, most people don't have a clarity problem. They have a truth problem. Today, we go deeper. The hidden patterns that keep you striving, shrinking and staying stuck. By the end of this episode, you'll be able to identify the sole level pattern running your decisions. Learn how to rewrite the story behind visibility and worthiness, and walk away with a simple practice to move forward with peace instead of pressure.

Welcome back, Dr. Donna. So excited to have you here.

Donna Tashjian (2:02)

Thank you.

Junaid Ahmed (2:04)

You're a strategist, an activator and a faith-based advisor. So let's go. Now, the last time we talked about calling without striving, fear versus passion, visibility, trauma, and identity theft.

Now today, you said we'd go into soul level pattern. Define that for us in plain language.

Donna Tashjian (2:27)

When things happen in our life, we begin to create patterns around coping with them. Would be one way to say it is, so this happens, I need to behave this way, or I behave this way and that didn't work. You can imagine the tiptoeing around perhaps a parent that comes home from work angry. You learn different patterns to respond to your environment, and though they become, even though they may not be you, maybe you're not the quiet child, but you become the quiet child to be able to respond and to survive and bring more peace to your environment. That's just like one example of the different things we learn that can become part of our identity, as opposed to maybe not who we really are. I'll use one example of mine. I, it doesn't matter what place I seem to go, I end up leading something. And I won't necessarily have a title. Maybe there's other people that are supposed to run things in the room, but it doesn't matter where I go. It's a pattern I've noticed over my life. I always found myself leading. But that took a while before I owned it. Because as a child, I was called Bossy.

And Bossy didn't feel good. Bossy wasn't a feeling I wanted to be.

And of course, I've learned how to walk in that leadership in a different way than perhaps a five-year-old telling my brothers, you need to do this, you know?

And so, but that's who God created me to be. Is I see things in a different perspective and I quickly can see a problem and organize it and just come to a solution, bring people together, all of those kind of things. But my mom kind of took advantage of that. She'd tell me to go tell my brothers to do things and that never worked.

Junaid Ahmed (4:33)

Of course not.

Donna Tashjian (4:36)

Now, I had four brothers. So just to get the picture of it. And I was the girl for a while and then my younger sister came along. But I was still, there was a big age difference. So I was the one mom said, go tell them to do this because I got stuff done.

But it also caused irritation with me and my siblings on how to do it. And so I quit being bossy.

I started hiding in the background. I didn't want any leadership role and I didn't understand what I was doing. I avoided the microphone, if you will, kind of settings. It's like not the actual microphone, but that microphone kind of place. In any organization I was in, I began to avoid it. And then God began to really work with me on who he created me to be and to reword the feeling bossy and what that means. And so that's just one example of how things happen with our soul and the way that we are. And it stops us sometimes from enjoying who Donna is or who you are, for example.