How Men Can Survive The Modern Dating World - Hamza - #421

**Chris Williamson** (0:00)
Hello everybody, welcome back to the show. My guest today is Hamza. He's a personal development coach and a YouTuber. Many young guys would rather watch porn and play video games than connect with the real world. This creates swaths of lonely, disconnected men and leaves women with fewer and fewer good options in the dating market. Meanwhile, Red Pill YouTube and the Manosphere can be a very negative influence, which keeps men stuck and demonizes women rather than helping everyone become better, happier, more attractive people. Expect to learn the biggest mistakes Hamza made when improving himself, why Fresh & Fit need to take food out of their mouth, Hamza's thoughts on Britney Spears getting naked on Instagram, how to avoid being blackpilled with a growth mindset, if Hamza thinks the future of dating will be polygamous, why the Manosphere sees women as the enemy, Hamza's reaction to Mikhaila Peterson and Rollo Tomassi's debate, and much more. Although they might just sound like memes or insults that people throw around in comment threads, the red pill, black pill, Manosphere, Lux Max, Pick A Part history, all of this stuff is part of the world that young guys are trying to absorb in an effort to become good with women. And some of it is good for guys and some of it's really terrible. And then all of the girls are downstream from this. The women are being affected by the content that men consume almost as much as the men are. So yeah, there's tons to take away from today. If you're a girl, perhaps you'll get an insight into what it's like to be a young guy trying to work out the way that the dating market operates at the moment. And if you're a young guy, I hope that Hamza gives you some good advice. He's got one of the fastest growing channels on YouTube at the moment. And he really does have a good insight into what it's like to be a young, growth minded guy in 2022 But now it's time for the wise and wonderful Hamza.
The dating YouTube space at the moment is totally fascinating, and it's fragmenting into loads of little subgroups at the moment. How would you categorize the content that you make? What's the purpose of the stuff that you put out on YouTube?

**Hamza** (2:21)
It's a holistic self-improvement. I love that term more than like, I've taken a bit from everywhere, right? I've done the full like hardcore red pill type of stuff. I've ventured into the black pill. So other people don't have to go and look at their content, but I found that there's never really like a healthy mix between them. A lot of them will just focus like just solely on women, seeing them as the enemy, trying to be sexist towards them or aggressive towards them. A lot of them just focus on like nihilism and like this sense of like hopelessness. And I don't think any one pill or space online really combines anything together to give like a younger man the framework for like a healthy life going forward, revolving around good relationships. And I love the term holistic self-improvement, which is just, okay, let's, why not? Why don't we all just improve as much as we can? So of course we'll try and up our SMV. We'll try and like attract more women and everything. But why not do that alongside things like healthy mental health practices, gratitude, mindfulness, learning things about like our childhood trauma and how that shapes our day in life.

**Chris Williamson** (3:18)
You're right. There's no one pill that's got all of the answers within it. And you can learn bits by bouncing between them. But it seems like the most toxic communities are the ones where someone's got into it and then never ever left.

**Hamza** (3:32)
Oh, that was me in the red pill for like seven years. You can like, I think you've taken it as well. Like you can really, really go deep inside one of these. And when you stop questioning the reliability, the accuracy of what, like, you know, the information that you consume, you can so, you can put like such a hindrance on your growth.

**Chris Williamson** (3:53)
Well, that's how cults work. That is precisely how cults work. That you have this leader, the leader's word cannot be questioned, because all of the followers that get co-opted in, they all just believe because you're supposed to believe and nobody questions anybody's words. And that lack of critical thinking causes... Think about what cults do. They wrap people around. It's a geographical location, but also an ideological location. They don't permit them to grow.