Giggling about cigars, cabaret, and compression socks

Hannah Berner (0:15)

Hello, my Giggly-saurus Rexes. Let me just say, I was like, Paige, can we get the party started? I need to complain about something. And she goes, I have to complain about you. With her long-ass finger, she goes, you. So now I'm scared, alone. No one's on my side. What did I do?

What did I do besides pull out my own back?

Paige DeSorbo (0:34)

I'm going to tell you exactly what you did. On the pod last week, you said, oh, do you ever dream about exes? And I was like, I haven't dreamt about an ex in 10 to 15 years. Like, it's just not something that happens to me.

I woke up this morning cursing. I laid in bed. I go, that bitch. Not only did I dream about the worst ex I've ever had in my life, he came up to me with a knife and said, if you don't-

Hannah Berner (1:05)

If you don't kiss me?

Paige DeSorbo (1:06)

If you don't stop, I'll kill you.

Hannah Berner (1:08)

Oh, stop what? Who knows?

Paige DeSorbo (1:10)

We don't know.

Hannah Berner (1:12)

Hopefully it's not one of those dreams that's like a Marvel movie where there's a new one every night and it like continues the plot. Maybe we'll see what happens.

Paige DeSorbo (1:20)

Well, you want to know what's crazy is the only way, the only reason I got out of the dream was something in real life woke me up.

Hannah Berner (1:28)

Kitty saved you.

Paige DeSorbo (1:29)

Like a sound woke me up and I was like, oh my God, I was just having the weirdest dream and then I didn't go back into it. Thank God.

Hannah Berner (1:37)

Why do I feel like it's worse when you dream good things about them? Like you're like, oh my God, he was so perfect. And then you have to spend all day remembering all the worst memories. And then you're like, I could have done without that.

Paige DeSorbo (1:49)

No, I definitely went throughout my day today like, yeah, he is a sociopath in every realm. He's fucking crazy.

Hannah Berner (1:58)

In every realm, he's ruining my life. Also, I do look like Angelina Jolie's cousin who is just not, should not, wants to be a spy, but can't, because she just can't get her stuff together. But she keeps trying out.

Paige DeSorbo (2:12)

You know what's crazy is I didn't even notice you were wearing sunglasses.

Hannah Berner (2:15)

Because you see me as pure energy.

Paige DeSorbo (2:18)

Yeah, I'm just like, that is the vibe. That's whatever her journey is today.

Hannah Berner (2:21)

You see me by my aura colors. You don't process actual things, you see?

I'm not in a good mood.

Paige DeSorbo (2:28)

Okay.

Hannah Berner (2:30)

Am I PMSing? Yes, but that's not it.

That's not the reason. What was the reason? The reason was, look, as you guys know, I pulled out my back, but somehow it's getting worse.

Paige DeSorbo (2:42)

Did people know that? Did you say that last time?

Hannah Berner (2:45)

Well, I made fun of these old men playing tennis with me, and then I pulled my back playing tennis with old men. And I do have a L4, L5 situation. I don't want to say situation, a little bulge disc, if any of the Gigglers or chiropractors.

And it was bad, and I got a massage yesterday, and it was going well. And then the lady pushed my knee towards my chest as a stretch, and I saw God.

Paige DeSorbo (3:13)

Yeah.

Hannah Berner (3:13)

But like, or Satan, one of the two. And then they left, and I told DeS, I'm like, I can't find a position that I'm not shooting pain.

Paige DeSorbo (3:24)

Wait, the massage fucked you up more?

Hannah Berner (3:26)

Yeah.

Paige DeSorbo (3:27)

Oh, like she pinched a nerve.

Hannah Berner (3:30)

She pinched the nerve more, and then I drugged myself. Yeah. And I slept all yesterday. It was so peaceful. I highly recommend it. And then this morning, I got a chiropractor appointment, made DeS walk half an hour with me to the chiropractor, because I'm not going to the doctor's appointment alone.

We walked.

Paige DeSorbo (3:48)

So you're not that injured?

Hannah Berner (3:49)

No, walking is good for your back, but I was limping.

Paige DeSorbo (3:52)

Hobbling. Yeah, hobbling.

Hannah Berner (3:54)

But I like the drama, so I let him get really far ahead of me and be like, wait, I'm coming.

Paige DeSorbo (4:00)

Also, because he always has a physical ailment, and you're probably used to that, so now you're like, roles reversed.