Fruit Substance

**SPEAKER_1** (0:00)
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**Angie Hicks** (0:30)
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**SPEAKER_3** (0:45)
You love summer, longer nights, beach days, barbecues, but hot and sweaty sleep, not so much. And you're constantly looking for the cool side of the pillow. You kick off the covers and go into starfish position. You crank the thermostat, and then you see the electric bill next month. If your pillow feels like it's trapping heat and has seen one too many summers, it might be time for a refresh. That's why Coop Sleepgoods is celebrating the 4th of July sale with up to 40% offsite wide. And if you spend $150 or more, you'll get a free gift with purchase while supplies last. Coop's adjustable pillows are designed for personal comfort, featuring cooling technology that helps keep you cool and comfortable throughout the night. So before you spend another night searching for the cool side of the pillow, give your bed the summer upgrade it deserves. Shop Coop's 4th of July sale at coopsleepgoods.com/comedy.
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**Johnny Cann** (2:13)
Hi, everyone, welcome to That Spooky, I'm Johnny.

**Tyler Hyde** (2:15)
And I'm Tyler.

**Johnny Cann** (2:16)
And this is a weekly podcast that came to be because we both ate an apple that a witch offered us. Sometimes it's a good thing.

**Tyler Hyde** (2:23)
That's right, you dangle a Granny Smith in front of me, I'm biting it.

**Johnny Cann** (2:27)
Yeah, I feel like witch apples have gotten a bad reputation over the years.

**Tyler Hyde** (2:31)
What kind of apple do you think is the go-to witch apple?

**Johnny Cann** (2:34)
Red Delicious.

**Tyler Hyde** (2:35)
Because they're aesthetically pleasing, but not actually that satisfying or delicious?

**Johnny Cann** (2:39)
What? How dare you? How dare you sit on my bed and badmouth a Red Delicious apple?

**Tyler Hyde** (2:46)
I thought your favorite apples were gala apples.

**SPEAKER_3** (2:48)
No, they're not.

**Tyler Hyde** (2:49)
Oh, you like the Red Delicious?

**Johnny Cann** (2:50)
Red Delicious is my favorite.

**Tyler Hyde** (2:52)
Oh, this is awkward.

**Johnny Cann** (2:53)
We're getting married in less than a month. And you, I'm pointing a lot of time right now.
In fact, I was pointing at the top of him and at the bottom of him, pointing up and down as I was deriding him. But no, and you have all the shit to say about my favorite apple.

**Tyler Hyde** (3:12)
Well, I listen, it's not just my opinion. I know that's the overall consensus of the Red Delicious. Yes.

**Johnny Cann** (3:17)
Who the fuck thinks...

**Tyler Hyde** (3:19)
Are you not listening to the apple discourse? No, I'm not.

**Johnny Cann** (3:22)
I grew up in the apple capital of Atlanta, Canada, the Annapolis Valley. Thank you very much.

**Tyler Hyde** (3:26)
Well, maybe that's the thing. Because you grew up in the apple capital, maybe your Red Delicious apples are actually delicious.
And everybody else's are less delicious.

**Johnny Cann** (3:38)
They're sweet and delicious. They're like the brown bread of the apple world. How dare you?

**Tyler Hyde** (3:43)
Well, see, I don't really like brown bread.

**Johnny Cann** (3:45)
Well, that's your problem too. Yeah. Oh my God. I love both of those things. And I will happily marry this man, because at least I know that I will forever get the brown bread and Red Delicious apples.

**Tyler Hyde** (3:58)
Yeah, and like I fully acknowledge I'm a sociopath. I love Granny Smith apples. Those are my favorite.

**Johnny Cann** (4:04)
Sure. You know what is also a really good apple that is completely slept on? The Lobo.
L-O-B motherfucking O.

**Tyler Hyde** (4:15)
I don't know her.

**Johnny Cann** (4:16)
It is a Canadian, I believe like Canadian variety of apple, but they're known, I don't know, they kind of look like little cartoon cherries. They have this like very bulbous short round look, almost not even cherries, almost like tomatoes.