Family Preservation & Systemic Reform with Renee Gellin of Saving Our Sisters (SOS)

SPEAKER_1 (0:10)

Hey, everybody, welcome back to another episode of Cate & Ty Break It Down, and we're going to get right back into the conversation.

Renee Gellin (0:16)

Yeah, the whole not telling people things and that lack of informed consent. Our SOS ideal situation is that I get to a mom right away, I give her all of the information, and she understands, right? And she's like, oh, this could be bad, right?

And listen, that's happened on occasion, I'll call it maybe 10 times in 15 years, where moms have relinquished. Now, two of those moms tried to revoke after they relinquished. So, because again, nobody can explain to you what that feels like.

Tyler Baltierra (0:55)

Really, eight out of 10, really. I mean, in a way.

Renee Gellin (0:58)

Yeah. So, but two of them tried to get their baby back, is what I'm saying. After being fully informed, right? I told them everything. I'm like, look, if you're willing to accept this risk, that's great.

And the other thing that I tell them too, is I didn't, I don't get to tell my kid that I tried.

Tyler Baltierra (1:15)

Yeah.

Renee Gellin (1:16)

I'm giving you a chance, mom, to try.

We'll bridge the gap for you for a couple months, heck, a couple weeks. Take your baby home, because we know what happens. You bond, right? You bond. It's mother nature.

Tyler Baltierra (1:30)

Yeah. Yeah.

Renee Gellin (1:30)

And that's what they don't want. That's why they're in the hospital. They want that bond and they want that baby separated from that mom as absolutely soon as possible. And Gladney was in my hospital room. They were in the hospital every day in my room.

And they were there at 72 hours and they had me sign 72 hours. Now, they don't tell moms that you can sign at this hour. You will sign and they are there to facilitate it. And that is what happens. And so that's part of the other deception and the deceit. It's deceit and deception.

Tyler Baltierra (2:09)

Yeah. And honestly, that is coercion. Cause if you have, like I don't think people understand what it feels like when you know you're already there, you're already vulnerable. You already know I don't have enough money. I don't have enough this. I'm not married enough. I'm not wealthy enough. I'm not whatever enough. And then you had these people who do have all these things in the next room right over there waiting to get this child that they obviously want so bad. I mean, how do you expect any woman to really feel totally confident and not coerce when that's happening behind closed doors? I remember when we were in the hospital. I mean, Dawn came in and it was like, hey, listen, it's been five hours.

And they really want to see the baby. And I remember thinking in my head, I'm like, well, yeah, five hours. Well, they have the rest of their lives. This is the only time that we're gonna have with her without any, without what, and really have total freedom with being the parent in that moment with the baby. So I remember thinking in my head, even that young like, wow, five hours, big deal.

You got a whole 18 years, you got a whole life with this baby. And I'll never forget that when we changed our hospital plan, because obviously agencies have you fill out this hospital plan about how things are gonna go.

Renee Gellin (3:24)

You sure do.

Tyler Baltierra (3:25)

Yeah, and so when that happened, and then Cate was obviously like, listen, okay, I wanna hold her. I wanna hold her. The original plan was that they were gonna hold her first and they were gonna get the baby right away and all these things. And then, like you said, mother nature takes over. The baby's born, things happen, which is totally valid and every woman has the right to embrace that mother nature happening. I don't think they should be coerced or told otherwise and not embrace it. And so when that happened, I remember having to go down and tell them that we're gonna hold her. And I'll never forget, like being so scared to go down there and tell them that we're gonna kind of change the hospital plan and we were gonna hold her first. Because when I went there and I told them, I said, hey, you know, Cate's gonna hold her. And I'll never forget Teresa saying, are you gonna hold her too?

And she moved her hair in a way and she kind of was like, almost like, I don't even know, I almost felt guilty.