Episode 439 - S20E5 - Accredo

Matthew Reuter (0:05)

Hello, listeners, and welcome back to another episode of Law and Order Special Viewing Unit. The show will be view, review, and a lovingly ridicule everyone's favorite cop drama Law and Order Special Victims Unit every episode in a row from the beginning.

Aviv Rubinstein (0:18)

At his mercy.

Matthew Reuter (0:20)

Even the pointless episodes. I am your host.

Aviv Rubinstein (0:24)

I think this episode definitely had a point, and the point is, don't fuck with Robin.

Matthew Reuter (0:32)

Also that, but there was no tension to any of it. It just was so linear. Maybe it's because it was more of a normal episode. I'm your host, Matt Rooney. Joining me as always, the Keith Ranieri of this podcast. That's Aviv Rubinstein over there. How are you doing tonight, Aviv?

Aviv Rubinstein (0:45)

I guess they couldn't protect her from the dark side of her life after all.

Matthew Reuter (0:49)

Who would have thought the cult didn't solve all of my problems?

Aviv Rubinstein (0:52)

I'm sorry. I have to scratch that payback, you fugly bitch.

Matthew Reuter (0:57)

Yeah, for the revenge porn, which is just like something you would see in the Victoria Secret Catalog.

Aviv Rubinstein (1:03)

Yeah. I mean, that's like a flaw of the show.

Matthew Reuter (1:05)

Right. Here's the thing. I understand it's like in the world of this. Like just blur it the fuck out or do like the bar thing.

Aviv Rubinstein (1:14)

Especially because the gore is pretty brutal in this episode.

Matthew Reuter (1:20)

Yeah. Right. I was sitting here watching the episode of the like, oh, look at these revenge points stuff. And I was just thinking, I was watching the MLB playoffs over the weekend, and they've got that Sydney Sweeney ad where she's not wearing any clothes. It's like, go that route then.

Aviv Rubinstein (1:37)

Sports. Yeah.

Matthew Reuter (1:39)

But like, if you're going to convey it, make it look like it's something that's not just like literally all over Twitter presently.

Aviv Rubinstein (1:47)

It's funny because they say that it was posted to Facebook, and so it can't be nude because it would get taken down.

Matthew Reuter (1:54)

Well, I don't. It's whatever. So how are you doing this week, Aviv?

Aviv Rubinstein (1:58)

I'm doing good. I have a couple of stories. It's been about a week and a half since we recorded. So of course, a couple of weird things happened to me, and I have a couple of recommends, soft and hard recommend.

Matthew Reuter (2:11)

Okay. Soft and hard. Is that the consistency of the poop you're going to be telling me about in this story?

Aviv Rubinstein (2:17)

Oh, hell no, because it was only soft. So, okay. Just to sort of level set.

Matthew Reuter (2:24)

I like how I set you up for that one, by the way.

Aviv Rubinstein (2:27)

On Friday, I went to my friend's 40th birthday party, slash like wedding.

It was like wedding light, wedding without the wedding. So it was catered. It was like at a wedding venue.

Matthew Reuter (2:44)

But no, just for the fuck of it?

Aviv Rubinstein (2:46)

Just for the fuck of it.

Matthew Reuter (2:47)

Oh, that's very nice. Did you have to pay to get in?

Aviv Rubinstein (2:49)

I did not have to pay to get in, which is very nice of her. And wore a suit. You saw the suit.

Matthew Reuter (2:56)

I did. It was very sharp.

Aviv Rubinstein (2:58)

Yeah, thank you. I walked in and said, give me the wallpaper.

And so I...

Matthew Reuter (3:05)

Did you stand at the mirror like out of Garden State?

Aviv Rubinstein (3:07)

Like in Garden State, yeah. So I have a system whenever there are past apps, which is I find the guy who's passing the apps.

I just single one person out because there's usually a team. Single one person out. And I'm like, oh, thank you. I'll just take one. And then they inevitably say, take as many as you want. And I say, oh, I will.

If you need to get rid of stuff, do you just come find me? Okay. I will take them off your hands for you.

Matthew Reuter (3:47)

Oh, so it's like they're trying to get them out the fucking door so they can just sit down?

Aviv Rubinstein (3:52)

Okay.

And so I say this, I make direct eye contact and I say, if you gotta get rid of stuff, you come to me. And then they all...

Matthew Reuter (4:01)

I am the garbage disposal. Whatever you just... You don't even have to pass them. Just bring them all to me.