Do you bite your fingernails waiting to find out who fibs about FINGERNAILS?

SPEAKER_1 (0:01)

Two people claim to know everything about something, but only one knows anything.

Ethan Berlin (0:37)

From Naylor, Missouri, this is The Big Fib.

SPEAKER_3 (0:42)

And now, here's your host, Dee B.

Ethan Berlin (0:45)

Dee Dee Dee, Abra Goldstein.

Deborah Goldstein (0:48)

Welcome to The Big Fib, the game show where kids choose between The polished and manicured hyponychium of truth, and the bitten and brittle talons of lies. I'm your host, Deborah Goldstein, and in the studio today is our sound effects robot, Lisa, whose name is an acronym that stands for Live In Studio Audience.

SPEAKER_3 (1:12)

Yes, here, ow! Ooh! Ow!

Deborah Goldstein (1:14)

Ooh, what happened, Lisa, are you okay?

SPEAKER_3 (1:16)

Oh, sorry, yeah, I'm okay. I just have to watch out for this small dent in my side panel. It hurts when I exert a lot of energy, so I'm just going to take it easy today.

Deborah Goldstein (1:26)

Wait, wait, how did you get a dent in your side panel?

SPEAKER_3 (1:29)

Well, I'll tell you, Debra, and I'll tell you that I blame humans.

Deborah Goldstein (1:33)

Oh, did a human do that to you?

SPEAKER_3 (1:35)

In a manner of speaking, yes. You see, humans have long stood by this myth that hammocks are relaxing.

Deborah Goldstein (1:43)

Hammocks? Well, yeah, they're very relaxing when you lie down and gently sway back and forth, feeling the summer breeze.

SPEAKER_3 (1:52)

Well, not so relaxing if you're lying in a hammock and then you lean over to pick up your toasted bagel with a smear of WD-40 and olives, and you tip over and land on your side panel. What's up with that? False advertising, humans.

Deborah Goldstein (2:06)

Oh no, I'm so sorry that happened.

SPEAKER_3 (2:09)

Yeah, luckily, I was able to eat my WD-40 and olive bagel while I was lying on the ground. But now I have to go to the gas station after the show and have someone pop out the stent. Those car mechanics are really good with metal.

Deborah Goldstein (2:20)

True, yes. Well, hopefully, they'll be able to sort you out quickly and painlessly. In the meantime, maybe you can keep your mind off your dented side. Looks to me like you have a listener question. Maybe answering that will help you.

SPEAKER_3 (2:32)

Good idea, Debra.

Naomi Becker (2:34)

Hi, Lisa. I'm Charlotte and I want to know, have you ever baked something? What have you baked? And was it yummy or did you need Debra's help finishing it? And also, have you ever burned whatever you've baked?

Thanks.

SPEAKER_3 (2:48)

Thank you for your question, Charlotte. And yes, I have baked many a tasty treat without any help from Debra. I have access to countless recipes and tutorials on the web that allow me to bake exceptional dishes, such as chocolate coil clusters covered in microchips and petroleum pie and an alloy crust.

And of course, I burn each dish. I can't even imagine how awful everything would taste if I didn't burn them. Can you imagine, Debra?

Deborah Goldstein (3:17)

Disgusting.

SPEAKER_3 (3:18)

Exactly. Anyway, you should come over later this week after I bake some Quay's Lime Pie.

Deborah Goldstein (3:22)

Oh, do you mean Quay Lime Pie?

SPEAKER_3 (3:25)

Ha ha ha. That's funny, Debra. How sad would it be to bake a Quay's Lime Pie with only one Quay?

Anyway, come on over and I'll serve you some of my very delicious and very burnt Quay's Lime Pie.

Deborah Goldstein (3:40)

Okay, well, I'll swing by for a visit, but I may bring my own snacks that are more appropriate for human consumption. Thanks. Let's get on with the show now, and you can remind our listeners, please, before we do get started how our game works.

SPEAKER_3 (3:53)

Sure thing. I'll do it in a jiffy.

Every week, we bring on two grown-ups. One is an expert, the other is a liar, and it's the job of a human child to help us figure out who is who, because no one can spot a liar better than a kid. We hope. What are we lying about today? Deborah, don't call me Deborah Goldstein.

Deborah Goldstein (4:13)

Well, no, do call me Deborah. We are lying about fingernails, the hard flat cover on the tips of our fingers. And we're going to learn all about fingernails along with our contestant today. Who might that be, Lisa?

SPEAKER_3 (4:26)

Our human child contestant is a 10-year-old who loves reading the book series Wings of Fire. Naomi Becker.

Deborah Goldstein (4:35)

Welcome, Naomi. How are you?

Naomi Becker (4:37)

Good.

Deborah Goldstein (4:38)

Awesome. Tell us about the Wings of Fire. What is that about?