Dangler Diaries, Kool-Aid Confessions & Jimothy's Fashion Revolution

**SPEAKER_1** (0:00)
Rizzuto, Rizzuto, Verudo.

**Thomas** (0:02)
Hey, everybody, this is Billy Kargan of the Smashing Pumpkins, and you're listening to the Rizzuto Show.

**SPEAKER_3** (0:06)
Happy birthday, Riz. I can't believe you're 99 again.

**Scott Rizzuto** (0:14)
Speaking of birthday, you guys had rehearsal yesterday for Bags Against the Machine.

**SPEAKER_3** (0:19)
We sure did.

**Scott Rizzuto** (0:20)
Birthday bash coming up on August the 15th at Delmar Hall.

**SPEAKER_3** (0:31)
Things a little bit different than we did last year just to maximize it even more. But I mean, last year was such a thrill. I mean, remember, it's supposed to be a one off thing.

**Scott Rizzuto** (0:40)
Last year, I had to pack together for my birthday.

**SPEAKER_3** (0:41)
It was so freaking cool.
Yeah, we're going to we're going to rip it. I just want to figure out what what I can get you involved in.

**Scott Rizzuto** (0:49)
Dude, I don't know, man, about getting up there and singing Rage Against the Machine. The lack of go wrong there.

**SPEAKER_1** (0:55)
You got it.

**Scott Rizzuto** (0:55)
Oh, no.

**SPEAKER_1** (0:57)
Have some faith.

**Scott Rizzuto** (0:58)
Oh, no.

**SPEAKER_1** (0:59)
Keep your phone.

**Scott Rizzuto** (0:59)
I will have to have a couple of those four hands birthday beers.

**SPEAKER_1** (1:02)
You got to keep your phone. You got it. That probably feel really good to do.

**Thomas** (1:12)
I'd be a fun part to do. Can't really screw that up.

**Scott Rizzuto** (1:24)
OK, get your tickets now. 105.7thpoint.com August 15th Domro Hall Pre-Party at Pin Up Ball. That'll be great. All right, Rafe Williams, it's time for this week's e-memorial.

**Thomas** (1:37)
And this week's e-memorial brought to you by bless you, Dayquil. Dayquil, it's fun to do at work.

**SPEAKER_1** (1:43)
It's true.

**Thomas** (1:44)
I'm going to try and do this. Although a lens fell out of my readers.

**SPEAKER_1** (1:47)
Oh, my.

**Scott Rizzuto** (1:47)
What happened to your glasses?

**Thomas** (1:48)
Oh, Thomas can't see without his glasses. Thomas needs his glasses.

**Scott Rizzuto** (1:58)
You see his glasses? One lens out. I don't know what happened.

**Thomas** (2:01)
Life is not going well.

**SPEAKER_1** (2:02)
That's it.

**Thomas** (2:02)
My life is falling apart, guys.

**Scott Rizzuto** (2:03)
Oh, it is?

**SPEAKER_3** (2:04)
You just need a Massimo shirt and some cargo.

**SPEAKER_1** (2:06)
I thought one eyeball was really big.

**Thomas** (2:08)
Is one eyeball really big if you look at me?

**Scott Rizzuto** (2:10)
Yes, it's so big.

**Thomas** (2:12)
Oh, he's got one big eye. This e-memoriam brought to you by nobody.
Dayquil. Chug it at work. But chug it at work. Dayquil. It's just Narcan. All right.
For those of you that don't know, the e-memoriams are like the Oscars e-memoriam where we say goodbye to people, places and things that we either pissed off or ride off for the week. Sometimes it's ourselves. Sometimes it's trolls. Sometimes it's topics we talked about. Anything's on the table. It's all tongue in cheek. We're having a good time. Here's what that being said. Let's get it started. This week, we laid a rest, a very important thing this week, guys. We laid it to rest in a ceremonial that we do all the time. A ceremony we do anytime someone lays to rest. Riz's Lady Dangler.
As part of the Ronald McDonald House agreement from Donnie's Radiothon, Riz had to, for a $2500 donation, Riz had to wear a dangler for one week. That was the female anatomy. Uterus from both ovaries and a couple of fallopian tubes.

**Scott Rizzuto** (3:11)
And I did it proudly, I'll be honest with you.

**Thomas** (3:12)
You did, and you learned a lot. That's what we're going to talk about now. We say goodbye to a dear friend this week. The dangling uterus earring that hung proudly from Scott Rizzuto's left ear for seven unforgettable days. While wearing it, Riz experienced what experts are calling a complete estrogen awakening.
He donated to the Susan B. Anthony Foundation. He watched Pretty Woman all the way through and gave it 9.4 on IMDb. He even ate a banana without snapping it into little non-threatening pieces first. He went in, raw dog, one bite, one gulp. He began saying things like, communication really is the foundation of every healthy relationship. And somehow he knew exactly what shade of lipstick Dusty Rose was. Oh, we're proud of you for that. He apologized before interrupting someone, spent 45 minutes picking out throw pillows.
He left a five-star review for his hairstylist because she really listened. He started every sentence for a week with, as a man, it's important I acknowledge my privilege, which we appreciated.

**Scott Rizzuto** (4:17)
That's the funniest one.