DAILY SHOW: The Perfect Voice For A Dildo | The Rizzuto Comedy Podcast

SPEAKER_1 (0:00)

The choice of a lawyer is an important decision and should not be based solely on advertisements.

Rizz (0:30)

If you know Dobbs Tire and Auto Centers, you love them. They guarantee the lowest tire prices in town and have a driveway tire package that includes free balancing, rotation and flat repair on their tires. It's incredible and it's helped Dobbs reach 50 years in business, 50 years. And to celebrate those 50 years, Dobbs has an exclusive savings for all our listeners this September. The biggest savings of the year. Stop by any Dobbs location now through September 30th to save up to 150 bucks on a new set of tires. At your next stop, take a look at your tires. Looking a little warm? Tread looking a little on the thin side? It happens. But it doesn't have to stay that way. Save up to 150 bucks on new tires right now at Dobbs. Do not let this offer pass you by. Stop in and get safer, newer, better tires for less while supplies last. Visit gotodobbs.com for a location near as you or see an associate for details. gotodobbs.com. Dobbs, celebrating 50 years.

Lern (1:30)

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The Rizzuto Show Podcast, powered by Dobbs. Dobbs Tyre and Auto Centers are hiring. Now with 42 stores.

Rafe (2:21)

Apply at gotodobbs.com today.

Rizz (2:24)

All right, let's hit it.

Rafe (2:26)

Little, little listener discretion is advised.

Rizz (2:45)

You're very excited.

Lern (2:45)

I am.

Rizz (2:46)

I just dropped my pen. Hang on, everybody.

Rafe (2:49)

Cancel the broadcast. Head on the bed.

Rizz (2:54)

Oh, who was that mysterious voice?

Lern (2:55)

Oh! Oh!

Rizz (3:00)

King Scott returns from paternity leave. You look good, you look well rested.

King Scott (3:07)

Thank you, I try.

Rizz (3:09)

Cause you know, when you got a new baby at home, everybody sleeps.

Rafe (3:11)

Oh, first.

King Scott (3:12)

So much sleep.

Rizz (3:13)

So much sleep.

King Scott (3:14)

It's absolutely amazing. You don't wake up a million times a middle of night. It's fantastic.

Rizz (3:18)

Well, congratulations.

Rafe (3:19)

I told you the triple bunk beds was a good idea.

King Scott (3:22)

Yeah, you did this, but we're working great.

Rizz (3:25)

So, the baby was born how many days late?

King Scott (3:28)

She was born, she was 30

Lern (3:30)

Six days, right? Six days late.

King Scott (3:32)

Or seven days, sorry, seven days.

Lern (3:34)

Cause September 6th.

Rizz (3:35)

Oh, that's right. So the baby was born officially on September 6th.

King Scott (3:38)

Yeah.

Lern (3:39)

She's a Virgo. Little Earth Sign Scott, that's the best.

Rizz (3:43)

Okay, so that was a, was that a Monday? Was that?

Lern (3:45)

Sunday night.

Rizz (3:46)

Okay. Sunday and then Labor Day was?

Lern (3:48)

And Labor Day was the 7th.

Rizz (3:49)

Oh, would have been funny.

King Scott (3:50)

I know. If she could have held out for almost an hour or more, she would have been a Labor Day baby.

Rizz (3:56)

She had jokes too. Cause it was hot. I mean, it was hot that weekend. We were all feeling for Allison.

King Scott (4:00)

Oh yeah.

Rizz (4:01)

I mean, she's very pregnant. The kid is late.

Lern (4:03)

She was like walking around the neighborhood. I saw a couple of posts of her and like her family and friends and you like walking around trying to get that baby to come out.

King Scott (4:10)

Yeah, I made her mo, cause I thought that'd help.

Lern (4:11)

Good.

Rizz (4:12)

Good. Yeah, man.

Lern (4:13)

Lern's right, dude. Keep her walking.

King Scott (4:15)

What's that?

Rafe (4:16)

Lern was right. Your kid is so much like you. She held out for Labor Day just for the dad joke.

Lern (4:20)

Yeah.

Rafe (4:21)

She couldn't quite hold on. She was trying so hard.

King Scott (4:24)

She just couldn't get the joke out, right?

Rafe (4:26)

I also love that I pulled in this morning and Mountaintop Motors gave you a minivan to drive.

Rizz (4:30)

That's nice.

Lern (4:31)

It's so nice.

Rafe (4:32)

It ain't souped up either. It's an old school.