Create a Happier Version of Yourself: Redirect Your Energy for Positive Thinking

**Mel Robbins** (0:00)
Hey, it's your friend, Mel, and welcome to The Mel Robbins Podcast.
Alright, I have a personal story that I am dying to share with you, and I'm also really excited because our 21-year-old son, Oakley, is going to be joining me on this episode, and you are going to get so much out of this. So here's the story. Couple of weekends ago, our son came home, he's a sophomore in college, and I was so shocked at how happy he was. And the reason I was shocked is because he's been miserable at school for about 18 months, like the lowest I have ever seen my son in his entire life.
And it makes you realize that I guess you never truly understand just how sad someone is until you see them happy again. And it's been so hard to watch him struggle in college, like maybe you should transfer, maybe you're in the wrong place, maybe you made a mistake. You can't find your people, you're just so unhappy. And as hard as it's been for me and for my husband Chris to watch him struggle, I know it's a lot harder to be the person that's unhappy. I mean, from the outside, you can feel how sad and disconnected they are. You hear it in their voice, you see it in their energy, you know you're just not yourself.
And if you're the person who's unhappy, over time, something happens. You become so discouraged, you start to believe this is how your life is always going to feel. And so we asked our son, what happened? And as he started to detail the things that had changed, there were four specific takeaways that emerged. And these are really interesting takeaways because they're very useful whether you're unhappy right now in your life, or you're watching somebody that you love who has become very unhappy. And you're gonna love these four takeaways because as you go through them one by one, it helps you understand, okay, is it truly the situation that's making me unhappy or is it me?
And once you go through these four takeaways, you are going to have a roadmap to become happy again or to go, whoa, it's not me, it's the situation. And the thing that's gonna make me happy is to leave it. You ready? I am. Let's get started.
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Hey, it's your friend Mel, and welcome to The Mel Robbins Podcast. I am ecstatic that you're here. Today's episode is going to be amazing. I love what we're gonna talk about today because it's just one of those conversations that I know is gonna either help you immediately, or it's gonna help somebody that you care about. And I'm also gonna be having this conversation with you and one of my most favorite people in the world. Who am I talking about? I'm talking about our son, Oakley Robbins. He's 21 years old. I cannot wait for you to meet him. And whether you're here right now in this moment of your life, and you're feeling unhappy, and you're trying to figure out, how can I be happy again? Am I unhappy because of the situation? Whether that's a relationship or a job or a place that you're living? Or am I unhappy because of the way I'm showing up to the situation?
If you're sitting here right now and you're struggling with a decision, okay, should I stay where I am or should I go?
You're going to leave our conversation today with four takeaways. What I love about these four takeaways is they basically act like a checklist. A checklist that you can use at any time that you feel unhappy, and they become a roadmap. And as you go through the four takeaways, you're gonna have to look in the mirror and be like, okay, it's me, it's me. Or you're gonna listen to all these four things. And as we go through the checklist, you're gonna go, oh, it's not me. And the way that we're gonna get into this checklist, I'm really excited about. Because we're gonna do it a deeply personal way. My son is gonna share all about what was happening and what was making him super unhappy. I'm gonna talk about a period in my life where I was really unhappy in a new chapter and kind of thought I had made a major mistake. And we're gonna use our personal stories as a backdrop to help you navigate those moments in your life where you're just not happy and you don't know what to do. I am so proud and so excited to introduce you to our son, Oakley Robbins. Oak is 21 years old. He just finished his sophomore year in college, which you're about to hear all about. And we're gonna use his experience of being unhappy as a way for us to talk about these four takeaways on this simple checklist that you can use to help you become happier and to help you make decisions about whether to stay or whether to go. All right, let's jump into it. Please help me welcome my 21 year old son, Oakley Robbins to The Mel Robbins Podcast.