Could You Spot a Psychopath? 5 Signs Detectives Missed for 40 Years | Paul Holes - PT 1 (Fan Fave)

**Paul Holes** (0:00)
Best thing that's ever happened to you financially, go. Easy, sold my car on Carvana, amazing offer. Really? I hit 200 on a scratcher. Did the scratcher come to your house and hand you a check? No. How many scratchers did you hit to get that? I hit a button on carvana.com once. Okay, that's fair. It's like the lottery, except you always win.
Not like the lottery at all, actually. Exactly, inexplicably good.

**Lisa Bilyeu** (0:25)
Offer's worth bragging about.

**SPEAKER_3** (0:27)
Sell your car today on Carvana.

**Lisa Bilyeu** (0:28)
Pick up VsMayApply. What do you do when you're sitting across from your romantic partner, potentially the love of your life, someone that you thought that you knew everything about, just like they know everything about you? And then randomly, they say or do something so out of character and unexpected that you're actually really caught off guard. Maybe they totally ignore your feelings or make a super insensitive comment or brush off the fact that their road rage was literally almost just causing you a freaking accident. You might realize it in the moment, but you start to notice there's actually a pattern, a pattern you control, manipulation and coldness. It's those little manipulations where they deny something happened or downplay it really started that chips away at your sense of reality, your confidence and your sense of self. And before you freaking know it, you don't even recognize yourself anymore. The sad truth is that manipulators are masters at making you doubt your own reality. And by the time you're realizing what's happening, you're already trapped in their freaking web. And that's why on today's episode of Women of Impact, we are diving into how these dangerous people, like psychopaths, manipulators, conmen and predators you expect would be so obvious to spot, are actually the ones hiding in plain sight and waiting just for their opportunity. And to pull back the curtain on exactly how dangerous people operate right under our noses is cold case investigator Paul Holes. Now this guy spent years hunting down some of the most elusive predators out there, including the infamous Golden State Killer, who attacked over 50 women and killed more than 13 people, and went undetected for over 40 years. And what he's sharing today is going to make you rethink everything you ever thought you knew about spotting danger. Now we go into the signs to look for when you're dating or meeting someone new, that could be a giveaway that something is actually kind of off about them. We talk about why some of the most dangerous people are often the ones who seem the most normal people. We go over how people like the Golden State Killer can hide in plain sight for decades, all while committing such horrific crimes. And we talk about how you can spot these subtle signs of manipulation and control that most people don't see until unfortunately it's too fricking late. Now the reality is guys that psychopaths are often hiding behind the normal people that you see every day. The barista making your coffee, your co-worker that everyone loves, or your gardener, or your neighbor, or your boyfriend that you've been seeing for months. Now by the end of this episode, you'll know the giveaway signs that a predator is trying to trick you and blend into everyday life. And of course, we're going to tell you exactly how you can protect yourself and the people that you love from these predators, abusers and manipulators who just want to fricking take your power and control. Not here, not now, not on this episode. I'm Lisa Bilyeu and this is Women of Impact.
Having spent decades searching for the infamous Golden State Killer, you say that the problem in catching a predator is that psychopaths hide in plain sight.
They could be our husbands, they could be a friend, they could be a Starbucks barista, or in this case, it was a police officer who walked amongst us for 40 years without even getting detected. So what traits can we actually look out for to know if there really is a psychopath in our lives?

**Paul Holes** (3:49)
If you are dealing with a true psychopath, somebody who doesn't have empathy, somebody who has a narcissistic aspect to their personality, they are trying to maintain an aura of normalness to the people around them, whether it be a wife, a girlfriend, a co-worker, etc.
So they can continue to do the types of crimes that they want to, that they fantasize about. Now, of course, when you are dealing with a psychopath, there are going to be certain indicators from the normal person wouldn't respond this way. Somebody like a child gets hurt, and most normal people are going to feel an emotional tug, and this person seems very distant and cold about this emotional event. So that's part of the trait that you would see with a psychopath. But they are very, very good at hiding in plain sight.