Bonus Episode - Jason Carpenter: Human Hunter

**SPEAKER_1** (0:00)
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**Jason Carpenter** (0:31)
Hey, everyone, this is Jason Carpenter, host of Dead Rabbit Radio. What you're about to listen to is a bonus episode. What this is, it's a segment I recorded for an episode that was running too long. Also, this story had nothing to do with anything else in the episode. But in the end, it made the episode too long, so I decided to cut it out. However, I did think it was entertaining and interesting.
You know, definitely interesting to law enforcement.
I'm sure they would love to listen to this segment. You know, the statute of limitations has ended on any crimes you will ever hear me talk about. That's not really a crime in this story. I mean, unless threatening another person would grieve his bodily arm as a crime, but in what world is that illegal? I think it's a fun segment, and I wanted to go ahead and share it with you. So strap in for this bonus episode of Jason Carpenter, Human Hunter.
Speaking of hell, actually, I want to do a little bit of a segue here. Recently, I talked about it on the show. I think someone in my friend's neighborhood is trapping cats, not to spay or neuter them, right?
Jason, this episode is already depressing enough. Are you going to start talking about the cat killer in the neighborhood again? Well, I finally left a post on Facebook. That's how us boomers interact with each other, right? If I lived in a college community, I would have posted a TikTok or an Instagram or something like that. It's just a sad face. It's Nicky from Obsession making a sad face. I know much of trapped cats, AI'd in the background. I posted it on Facebook. Who's trapping the cats? And yeah, other people have put again, is it trolls? Right? Who knows? You know, but other people have said, yeah, I've noticed cats missing as well in that same area. So there might actually be something to that. It's funny when I wrote the post, I didn't know it had to be approved by a moderator of the Hood River group. But here's the thing, I was definitely originally going to be more threatening. When I was thinking about what I was going to write, I was going to say, hey, someone's hurting the cats in the area. And if I find you, and I will eventually find you somehow, that's a bit of a, I mean, who knows if I ever would, right? I forget about it a couple of weeks from now. I was like, oh yeah, wasn't I supposed to be on some blood vendetta or whatever? I originally was going to write, hey listen, if I find you, I'm going to find you eventually, and I'm going to see how you like it. I'm going to build a human size trap. And he's like, I won't go into it. I was like, I'll just push you into it. I was going to say something along the lines, obviously. It was in verbatim, but I was thinking this. I go, what I would do to you is I'm going to take a claw hammer, I'm going to pop out one of your kneecaps.
Right? That's been an escalation. I mean, cats are cool and all. Doesn't mean that gives you carte blanche to cripple a man for life. Yeah, but I didn't write that. Here's the thing, that's how I was feeling. That would be what actually ends up happening to this dude. I don't know. I can't see in the future. But I go, I'm not going to post that online, obviously, if a future employer is like, oh, I wonder what this chasing guy has been up to. Oh, apparently he loves maiming humans.
I did end it with, I said, stop, stop before I find you was the end of the statement. I said, whoever's doing this, stop, stop before I find you. I left it veiled. But threatening enough, I find out who's doing this.
In my own true crime segment, another podcast may cover the cat vigilante. I'm actually going to dress up in a cat suit, and I'm going to hide, and I'm going to walk around town. That's a crime, I'm pretty sure. No, it's actually not. You're allowed to dress up as animals and walk around town. But instead of claws on my hands, I'm going to have tiny claw hammers, and I'm going to be attacking people's kneecaps willy nilly. I mean, eventually, there's only 10,000 people who live in town or the county. Eventually, that's 20,000 kneecaps. That's possible, right? You could de-knee 10,000 people. I get bored. I'm like, oh, this is way too much work. I didn't know the human muscle system was so strong. Anyways, like, what type of monster? Listen, I can understand if someone was trapping cats for humane reasons, right? Trapping cats and having them have these procedures done, having them spayed or neutered. But if you're trapping cats just to maim them or kill them, stop. Stop before I find you. So anyways, we'll see if anything comes of that. I did think I was like, I made that threat and then I go, I mean, listen, when I was younger, when I was a young man in my 20s, oh, 100%, I could track this guy down. I mean, I can still do it today. I probably could find out where the guy lives.