A Tale of The Chubby

Jordan Okun (0:06)

All right, Mad Food, I'm Jordan, Max is here, and in honor of Max only being down 89 pounds, in honor of him asking his doctor to hook him up with a semiglutide that's unregulated by the FDA, it's time for A Tale of The Chubby. It's been so long.

Max Shapiro (0:26)

It has been so long. Can't wait to hear what you did to your body.

Jordan Okun (0:31)

It is time. I've been able to curb these lately. You know, people have been asking for them, but I've really been able to curb them to the chagrin of the audience. They've been asking for more tales, but because of these GLP-1s, and because I seek health and I seek longevity, I've been able to tame the beast within.

But everyone will be thrilled to know of these two colliding life factors.

A big bang, if you will. One, I was a little late on the fat shot. Let a couple days go, you know? You get to that end of that week, for anyone who doesn't know, anyone who's not on one of these fat shots, and Max knows all too well, right Max? It's four shots a month, right?

Max Shapiro (1:23)

That's right, yes.

Jordan Okun (1:23)

Okay, so you get a prescription, and you get four shots a month. And you could really take them whenever you want, but you're supposed to take them once a week.

And I let it go a couple days, and that hunger, that comes back, right? You know what I'm talking about?

Max Shapiro (1:41)

Yeah, I mean, it does have a little more of a half-life than that, but please continue.

Jordan Okun (1:44)

Okay, so.

Max Shapiro (1:45)

It's the situation you put yourself in.

Jordan Okun (1:47)

I was a little delayed on the fat shot, and it was my child's birthday party. So that really set the chubby stage.

Max Shapiro (1:57)

You know, these chubby stages, it's always at a party where there's food just like sitting around. It's never in a controlled environment. It's always when there's no control.

Jordan Okun (2:10)

You know, you're not wrong, and I have no self-control. So when all that stuff's around, is that why you never have a chubby tale? Because you're always in more controlled environments than I am?

Max Shapiro (2:24)

If I am put in a situation where it's basically limitless, I'm gonna test that.

Jordan Okun (2:33)

So you never keep things, but you keep things in your home, right?

Max Shapiro (2:37)

Not enough for A Tale of The Chubby.

Jordan Okun (2:39)

Okay.

Max Shapiro (2:40)

Just little things.

Jordan Okun (2:42)

Okay.

Max Shapiro (2:42)

Yeah.

Jordan Okun (2:43)

All right, well, I'm in uncontrolled areas in situations all the time. All right, so it's my daughter's birthday, and she likes a small birthday. We had three friends over, and they just, they do this thing where they, you know, the birthday party's back in the day, you'd have a ton of people, you get a fucking clown or, you know, the band come and play a bunch of kids' songs.

Max Shapiro (3:08)

The bouncy castle.

Jordan Okun (3:10)

All right, castle, right? Or you go to an arcade or like an ice skating ring.

Max Shapiro (3:15)

Laser tag.

Jordan Okun (3:16)

Laser, all this stuff, right?

But daughter wanted to keep it small, so she invites three of her close friends over. And the plan is, they're just going to galvan around the city and do girl shit. Okay, so, you know, like, you know, they meet up, they go to Starbucks, they eat some, they drink some horrific things there.

Max Shapiro (3:40)

A Frappuccino. Right, yeah.

Jordan Okun (3:42)

They love that Starbucks. Then they go, they get their hair blown out, you know.

They go to one of those bars. What's that bar called? Dry bar.

Max Shapiro (3:51)

Dry bar. Brazilian blowout. Right.

Jordan Okun (3:54)

They get, yeah, the girls with the, you know, they're a bunch of little Jewish girls. So most of them have, like, thick hair, so they're all wanting that nice thin hair. And then there's one with, you know.

Max Shapiro (4:04)

Thin or straight?

Jordan Okun (4:05)

Thin and straight, right? And then there's like, you know, there's one girl with thin hair, so she wants curls. All right, so they're having a great time at Dry Bar. I'd kill to go to a Dry Bar.

Then they go to the Grove.

Max Shapiro (4:23)

Okay.

Jordan Okun (4:25)

They go shop. God knows where they went shopping.

You know, they go shopping around. They go to the farmer's market. They eat some pasta. They make bags of candy at Dillon's.