#932 - TJ Kirk

Joe Rogan (0:00)

Boom, boom! Five, four, three, two, one.

We're live here from the Valley with the artist formerly known as the Amazing Atheist.

TJ Kirk (0:11)

Hello.

Joe Rogan (0:12)

Imagine if I just started talking like that with no explanation, I just kept it going for years, everybody like, one day he's gonna drop it.

TJ Kirk (0:19)

I kind of dropped it a little.

Joe Rogan (0:21)

The Amazing Atheist, right?

TJ Kirk (0:23)

Yeah, I mean, I still use it, I oscillate, I'm kinda trying to transition to just using my real name.

Joe Rogan (0:28)

Well, the last time you were here, you talked about that, and that was, I think, two years ago. So this was slow.

TJ Kirk (0:34)

It was a year and three months ago.

Joe Rogan (0:37)

Oh, that's it?

SPEAKER_3 (0:37)

Yeah. Really? Yep.

Joe Rogan (0:39)

Wow.

TJ Kirk (0:40)

It was January of 2016

SPEAKER_3 (0:44)

Why do I feel like it was so... My memory.

TJ Kirk (0:47)

I don't know.

Joe Rogan (0:47)

You know what, you know that Dunbar's number thing, where you can only fit so many people in your brain? Yeah. There's definitely that going on in my head, and then too much data.

My hard drive is fucked. You know, if you get an old laptop and it keeps telling you, you're gonna have to delete some files because you're running out of space, and that's my brain.

TJ Kirk (1:06)

Yeah, I mean, my brain is even worse because literally things like, things I knew yesterday, I don't know today anymore. Like, my memory is dog shit.

Joe Rogan (1:17)

And you were just saying you haven't smoked pot in days.

TJ Kirk (1:19)

Yeah. Not in days.

Joe Rogan (1:21)

Interesting.

SPEAKER_3 (1:22)

Days and days. Days and days and days.

Joe Rogan (1:26)

Like, I fucked up and had an edible last night.

I did this, there's a show that my friend Jeremiah Watkins has, and it's like a make-em-up show. They call it Stand Up on the Spot where the audience will yell out, you know, fried broccoli, like whatever. And you just have to rant on broccoli, like what your thoughts are, try to get some comedy out of it. And occasionally, maybe one out of 10 subjects, it will actually yield a real bit that'll become a bit in your act. It's really kind of amazing when you put on the pressure like that. So I said, what a good time to test the deep end of the pool and find out what these speed weed edibles are all about.

Whew, I fucked up.

TJ Kirk (2:03)

Yeah.

My brother had like a panic attack on edibles just like a few days ago.

My friend brought over some like pot brownies and he had one. He's not really used to edibles. Anyway, I go to bed. I'm laying down and watching like Star Trek Deep Space Nine or some shit. I get a knock on the door like, TJ, hey man, can you come out here for a minute? I'm like, okay. What the hell is this? I go out there, he's like, I'm really not feeling good, man. I think I'm having a heart attack, dude. I'm like, dude, you're probably just having a panic attack from too much weed.

Okay, have this ever happened to you? Has this ever happened to you? I'm like, yeah, it's happened to me before. Just calm down. I know your heart's racing, you feel disoriented and shit.

And I thought I was calming him down. I spent like 30 minutes talking to him down, but finally, you know, and he seemed like he was like, okay, yeah, yeah, I'm cool now, I'm cool now. And then just all of a sudden, like, no, I feel terrible, we gotta go to the hospital. I gotta go to the hospital, dude. I gotta go to the fucking hospital. And I drove him over there, and I sat down in that fucking hospital waiting room, and there was like this fucking ad for Stanley Steamer, and there was this terrible jingle, and I'm like, it's like the worst jingle I've ever heard. It's not gonna get stuck in my head. And now to this day, call 1-800-STEAMER, Stanley Steamer, your certified cleaner. I'll be in bed at night, and that shit will be in my head just over and over and over and over and over again.

Joe Rogan (3:53)

Yeah, they have wizards that come up with those things, man. Even the ones that suck, they just get in there, you know?

TJ Kirk (3:58)

Oh yeah, it's a terrible one. And he gets out, they gave him some fucking Ativan.