8 Unexpected Lessons To Be Less Hard On Yourself - Oliver Burkeman - #840

**Chris Williamson** (0:00)
Hello everybody, welcome back to the show. My guest today is Oliver Burkeman. He's a journalist, a writer for The Guardian and an author. Does trying harder to be extra productive actually work? Does it net more success or just more misery? For the type A people in the world, how can we learn to be less tough on ourselves and maybe have more fun in the process? Expect to learn what imperfectionism is, how to overcome decision paralysis and to deal with distractions, whether or not there is an easy solution to imposter syndrome, an unexpected answer to fixing procrastination, the most effective ways to curb self-criticism, why you should stop berating yourself for not being sufficiently present and much more. Oliver has probably been my favorite writer over the last 12 months, certainly in the top three, and I just love this sort of very unashamed, raw, open perspective on the fallibility of all of us trying to work harder and the inevitable face planting that we do on a daily basis. He's so great and I really feel like he gives me license to open up more about my shortcomings too. He's so phenomenal, the new book's great. You should check that out. And yeah, there is just so much to take away from today. So please enjoy it. Honestly, the difference in the quality of your life when you have a world-class backpack is pretty hard to describe. Nomatic make the most functional, durable and innovative backpacks, bags, luggage and accessories that I've ever used. The 20 litre travel pack and Carry On Classic are absolute game changers. The amount of thought that they've put into every pouch and zipper is incredible. They're beautifully designed and not over-engineered and will literally last you a lifetime because they've got a lifetime guarantee. So if it breaks at any point, they'll give you a new one. They also offer free shipping on orders over $49 in the contiguous United States. And if you don't love your purchase, you can return or exchange your item 30 days after you've received it for any reason. Right now, you can get a 20% discount and see everything that I use and recommend by going to nomatic.com/modernwisdom. That's nomatic.com/modernwisdom. This episode is brought to you by Shopify. Businesses that sell more sell on Shopify, which is why they are the global force behind Gymshark, Skims, Allo and Neutonic. When it comes to converting browsers into buyers, they are best in class. Their checkout is 36% better on average compared to other leading e-commerce platforms. And their shop pay means that you can boost conversions by up to 50%. Best of all, their award-winning support is there to help you every step of the way. Look, you're not going into business to learn about how to code or build a website or do backend inventory management. Shopify takes all of that off your hands and allows you to focus on the job that you came here to do, which is designing and selling an awesome product. Upgrade your business and get the same checkout that we use at Neutonic with Shopify. Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at shopify.com/modernwisdom or lowercase. That's shopify.com/modernwisdom to upgrade your selling today. You probably want to look good and feel good when you're in the gym and Gymshark makes the best men's and girls' gym wear on the planet. They don't do running, they don't do yoga, they don't do extreme unicycling. Gymshark does gyms. Their studio shorts for men are literally the best pair of training shorts I have ever found in my entire life. Their crest hoodie in light grey mall is what I fly in every time that I'm on a plane and their geo seamless t-shirt is what I've been training in every single day for years now. Basically everything they make is unbelievably well fitted and high quality and you get 30 days of free returns globally with global shipping plus a 10% discount sitewide. Head to the link in the description below or go to gyms.sh slash modernwisdom and use the code MW10 at checkout at gyms.sh slash modernwisdom and MW10 at checkout. But now, ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Oliver Burkeman.
What is imperfectionism?

**Oliver Burkeman** (4:33)
This is my proprietary term, because I think you gotta have a proprietary term for a sort of umbrella term for this whole approach that has sort of been taking, getting clearer and clearer in my mind in the last few years. And I guess it is the simplest way to talk about it is understanding your built-in limitations as a human, your finite time and finite talents, finite energy, finite attention, as not things you have to spend your whole life struggling to do away with, but actually like the portal to a sort of energized and accomplished and interesting life. So it's about embracing limitations of all kinds, including the fact that we can't ever produce anything perfectly.