#2393 - Bryan Callen

Bryan Callen (0:03)

The Joe Rogan Experience.

SPEAKER_3 (0:06)

Trained by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night, all day. I was at Taron Tactical, and I was shooting, and Logan Paul was there, and I just met him. And I hit a dove.

Bryan Callen (0:24)

No.

SPEAKER_3 (0:24)

I grazed a dove somehow, right?

Bryan Callen (0:26)

Oh no. Yeah, they do fly around there. Yeah.

SPEAKER_3 (0:29)

And so Logan and I come up, and I grab the dove, and I'm going to ring its neck so it doesn't suffer. And Logan goes, wait, hold, let me just see it. And he takes it in his hands.

And instead of me ringing its neck, because I don't want it to suffer, I swear to God, it was all... You know how the wing is like this? His Jesus energy, whatever his energy is, he held it in both hands. I swear to God, the thing kind of just went... Just kind of put its wing back in and just fucking flew out of his hands. And I was like, all right, well...

Bryan Callen (1:04)

You were gonna kill it.

SPEAKER_3 (1:05)

I was gonna kill it. I was like, all right.

Bryan Callen (1:07)

They are delicious.

SPEAKER_3 (1:08)

Maybe that's Logan's celebrity power.

Bryan Callen (1:10)

Do you know that it's like the most hunted bird in North America?

SPEAKER_3 (1:13)

Listen, pigeons delicious. And I was just hunting them in London, sir. On the outskirts of London. I just got back.

Bryan Callen (1:19)

I was like, in the city, I don't think you're allowed to do that.

SPEAKER_3 (1:24)

This is why I can't do anything. Look at me. I don't know how to do this. Help me.

Bryan Callen (1:28)

It's like a door. You open the other like that. I know it's weird.

SPEAKER_3 (1:33)

Yeah, but you know, I get pissed when I can't figure out a little shit like that. Yeah. Like a child seat. I'm like, okay. I look at my wife, I go, you do it. I just throw my hands up.

Bryan Callen (1:41)

What is it about men that we don't read directions? I never read directions. I open the box, I look at this fucking bullshit, put that aside. I don't need this. No, I'll figure this out.

SPEAKER_3 (1:53)

My wife, I remember one time, when my kid was really young, I had to put together a child's bed. I'm like, I can do it. I go to put the bed together.

Well, I couldn't. I couldn't because there were directions. I was like, the screws, they number the screws. Oh, yeah. I'm sitting there like this and I'm making noises. I'm going, my wife is like, what's wrong with that? Stay out of the room. Apparently, she gave me the room. Get out of the room. I got this.

Bryan Callen (2:21)

You should do hard cardio before you put together in your child's.

SPEAKER_3 (2:24)

No, this is what I did.

Bryan Callen (2:25)

Just get calm first.

SPEAKER_3 (2:27)

I called my buddy and I go, I'll give you $300 to come over here right now and put this bed together. He builds houses, he comes over, he goes, it's four slats in a frame. What kind of a moron are you? He couldn't believe it. I was like, shut up.

Bryan Callen (2:38)

Well, that's different though. That's a guy who's used to using his hands.

SPEAKER_3 (2:41)

Yeah.

Bryan Callen (2:41)

Not a delicate man like yourself.

SPEAKER_3 (2:43)

That's correct, sir. I have soft hands.

By the way, fresh, if I have some marks on my face, I'm fresh from the mat of doing takedowns at 58 That's a good time.

Bryan Callen (2:56)

How's your back? You all right?

SPEAKER_3 (2:57)

You know what, dude? My back is actually good because I've mastered the art of warming up.

Bryan Callen (3:02)

Oh, that's good. That's smart.

SPEAKER_3 (3:04)

I'm pedantic about it. Like, they make fun of me and I'm like, fuck off.

Bryan Callen (3:07)

Yeah, you should.

SPEAKER_3 (3:08)

I do my bird dogs, my fire hydrants.

Bryan Callen (3:09)

You know Muhammad Ali used to work out for, well, he used to warm up rather for an hour before he worked out?

SPEAKER_3 (3:16)

Yeah, I watched Manny pack out. I didn't know that, but that's how you stay from getting injured.

Bryan Callen (3:19)

I did this thing with Tosh, Daniel Tosh and I, at the Wild Card Gym where Tosh was getting punched by Manny. And I was like, help. It was like some silly sketch we were doing. And, but Manny was there for a real workout day and just kindly allowed Tosh like 20 minutes of his time. And they did this little thing. But I got to see Manny work out. It is very meticulous. It's all like these, he's working out with rubber bands where it's like short little movements and it's all these twisting and turning. And he's got guys stretching them. He's like, you know, he's moving around. Like everything's very slow.