#2236 - Protect Our Parks 13

Joe Rogan (0:01)

Joe Rogan Podcast, check it out!

Mark Normand (0:03)

The Joe Rogan Experience.

Joe Rogan (0:06)

Shrain by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night, all day!

Shane Gillis (0:12)

Boys, boys, we're up.

Mark Normand (0:13)

Hey.

Ari Shaffir (0:15)

Let's go. Party.

Shane Gillis (0:16)

Headphones, you know how we do it.

Ari Shaffir (0:17)

Black guys can be gay now.

Shane Gillis (0:18)

What happened?

Ari Shaffir (0:19)

Black guys can't be gay. It's allowed.

Ari Shaffir (0:21)

They were never allowed to be gay.

Shane Gillis (0:22)

Well, I think the ditty thing let it all out of the closet. Like, hey, what kind of numbers are we talking about here?

Ari Shaffir (0:27)

Yeah, I need something concrete. Wait, wait, wait.

Shane Gillis (0:30)

I want to try this.

Ari Shaffir (0:30)

I want to try this. I want to try this. He's got a new recipe.

Ari Shaffir (0:32)

Hey, new recipe, new bottle on Bodega.

Shane Gillis (0:35)

What's the new recipe?

Ari Shaffir (0:36)

Check it out. Tastes just like Buffalo Trace.

Shane Gillis (0:39)

Well, I have Buffalo Trace right here.

Ari Shaffir (0:40)

He just poured out Buffalo Trace into Bodega Cat.

Shane Gillis (0:43)

Let me try it next to each other.

Ari Shaffir (0:43)

This is better for you.

Shane Gillis (0:44)

Oh, it's better for you?

Ari Shaffir (0:45)

Yeah, Buffalo Trace is racist and homophobic.

Ari Shaffir (0:48)

It's got blood diamonds in it, too. Hold on.

Shane Gillis (0:50)

OK, Bodega Cat. It's pretty good.

SPEAKER_7 (0:53)

Hey!

Shane Gillis (0:54)

That's pretty good.

SPEAKER_7 (0:55)

New batch.

Ari Shaffir (0:55)

Endorsement.

Shane Gillis (0:56)

It's different. It's better than the old one. Yeah, it's smoother.

Mark Normand (0:59)

Is that an official endorsement?

Shane Gillis (1:01)

OK, now, Buffalo Trace.

Ari Shaffir (1:02)

Easy.

Shane Gillis (1:05)

Oh, they win.

Ari Shaffir (1:08)

You gotta do blind taste tests.

Ari Shaffir (1:09)

I'll take it.

Shane Gillis (1:10)

You can't fuck with... Pretty good, though.

Ari Shaffir (1:12)

That's an upgrade from last time.

Shane Gillis (1:13)

I'm fucking around, kind of. This is good. This is, the Buffalo Trace is really good, but that's way better than the first version.

Ari Shaffir (1:19)

Thank you!

Shane Gillis (1:19)

Bodega Cat's good. Like, if I got that at a bar, I'd be like, oh, this is nice.

Ari Shaffir (1:22)

Yeah. You know, it's fun. We didn't even change it. I lied.

Shane Gillis (1:25)

Really?

Ari Shaffir (1:26)

Uh-huh, you see? Marketing.

Ari Shaffir (1:27)

Really? It's smooth.

Ari Shaffir (1:28)

Lying works.

Shane Gillis (1:29)

How do you not change it?

Ari Shaffir (1:31)

No, we changed it.

Ari Shaffir (1:32)

I was like, that doesn't make any sense, because the first one was like, it kind of had like, Marketing Norman.

Shane Gillis (1:37)

The first one kind of had like, a rushed taste to it. You know, like if you're doing a gig in Cincinnati, and you know, they're not really using well whiskey.

Ari Shaffir (1:46)

Yeah.

Shane Gillis (1:46)

You know what I mean? You order a drink at the bar, and you're like, what is this?

Ari Shaffir (1:49)

It's a local low-level brewery.

Shane Gillis (1:52)

Yeah.

Ari Shaffir (1:52)

Distillery.

Ari Shaffir (1:54)

Sorry.

Ari Shaffir (1:55)

Thank you. Hey, how about some stogies, huh, boys?

Shane Gillis (1:58)

I got some.

Ari Shaffir (2:00)

I brought you guys some from fucking Cuba, and then they stole them at the airport.

Mark Normand (2:04)

You've battled with TSA, dude. TSA owns your ass.

Ari Shaffir (2:09)

God damn it, they keep beating me.

Mark Normand (2:11)

You got your lighter in front of you. You screamed at them.

Ari Shaffir (2:13)

That was so great. I was in full fucking bitch mode, and Shane's like, whoa.

Mark Normand (2:17)

Yeah, I didn't know you had this trauma with them.

Shane Gillis (2:19)

But yo, imagine being them, though. Imagine dealing with people's stinky feet and bullshit excuses.

Mark Normand (2:24)

And then some giant Jew comes in with a gun lighter. He's trying to get on a plane, and you're like, no.

Jamie Vernon (2:31)

And he's like, what the fuck?

Shane Gillis (2:32)

He's got a dildo strapped to his dick.

Ari Shaffir (2:34)

I was losing it. I was like, I hope your wife gets raped. Fuck you.

Shane Gillis (2:38)

I was with Ari once when Ari farted on a TSA person. I said, I just farted on you. No. Yes, he did. 100%.

He was, this is like young Ari. Young Ari was even more crazy.

Ari Shaffir (2:50)

Young Ari was great.

Shane Gillis (2:51)

Young Ari was even more crazy. And young Ari was like, this is what you choose to do with your life. This is what you choose to do with your life. Violate people's freedom. This is what you choose to do with your life. He would never ever let them put him to the cancer machine. He only would get touched. So he would like, no, no.