#1812 - Doug Stanhope

Doug Stanhope (0:14)

Good morning.

Joe Rogan (0:16)

Good to see you, pal.

Good morning, first sip of the hooch of the day. That's not your first cigarette. How many cigarettes have you got so far?

Doug Stanhope (0:24)

To the point where I go, maybe I should have brought two packs.

Joe Rogan (0:26)

By the way, ladies and gentlemen, Doug Stanhope just found out today that he has had COVID.

Doug Stanhope (0:30)

Just moments ago. You didn't even know you had it. Do the regular COVID test before you do the show. And she goes, have you had the antibody one? And I said, no, because I always feel like I have COVID.

Joe Rogan (0:45)

Did you say, and I read this, that people who smoke cigarettes for some reason were like getting it less?

Doug Stanhope (0:52)

Yeah, I read a lot of those, and then I saw a lot that disputed that, so I didn't read the ones I didn't want to hear that news. And I read the ones that say, yeah.

Joe Rogan (1:03)

Yeah, that sounds like how I digest news.

Doug Stanhope (1:05)

But they also say if you do get it, you're more likely to wind up on a fucking respirator, which I'm going to wind up on a respirator at this rate regardless. I don't mind if I fast forward the process.

Joe Rogan (1:19)

We've got to fill you up with stem cells, get you in a hyperbaric chamber, reverse the process. Just clean you up.

Doug Stanhope (1:28)

From 40 years of smoking?

Joe Rogan (1:30)

Bison meat, spring water. We got you. Don't worry.

Just put yourself in Dr. Rogan's care. We're going to take care of you as I puff on this joint.

Doug Stanhope (1:41)

I did, oh, so I go to kill Tony last night, and I'm up on the judge's stand, whatever you call it, and I'm pretty pickled by then.

We started with Margarita's at 1.30, and now it's 9 o'clock.

After the show, some guy tries to give him a bag of edibles, and he goes, no, no, thanks, though. And I go, no, you always take the drugs, even if you don't want them, and then you give them to someone else at the thing and go, hey, I can't fly with this. And then you made two people really happy. One guy's happy that you took his drugs, and the other guy's really happy. So I go, what are they? And he said, 50 milligrams. And I split it. I took half, because I'm a 10-milligram guy. I'm tripping my balls off on 10 Really? Yeah, and then Tony, I gave Tony the other half, and he goes, no, I don't do weed. And I go, ah, fuck it. So I took 50 milligrams, and I was drinking enough. I drunk enough that I kept forgetting that I was super fucking high.

I thought I was just too drunk to be in the bar. And then I got back to the room, and I'm digging through my bag, trying to find any leftover bag of fucking airplane peanuts I might have left behind, because I'm too high to be in public and go buy something to eat, and there's nothing in the hotel open, and I'm just eating fucking gummy bears and salty snack fucking mix.

Joe Rogan (3:03)

That's one thing I don't get for whatever weird reason. I don't get munchies when I'm high.

I don't know why. It's never been a thing.

Doug Stanhope (3:11)

Sometimes I will only eat if I take edibles now. Really? I think I get 85% of my calories from liquid boost.

Joe Rogan (3:20)

How much edibles are you taking these days? Because you were always like a non-weed guy.

Doug Stanhope (3:24)

Yeah, but they made edibles delicious. I always hated the taste of smoking. It would make me cough. I was one of those guys who coughs on the first puff, and then I'm coughing for an hour, and then the yuck mouth I got would ruin the taste of cigarettes.

I like cigarettes more than being high. But edibles is a whole different story.

Joe Rogan (3:45)

Yeah, I love edibles. I love gummies. I love those little gummies, because you take them, and it's about an hour in, they start to creep into your system, and then an hour and a half in, and you're like, oh, Jesus.

I love them.

Doug Stanhope (4:00)

Sometimes for me, it'll be three hours. Sometimes it's 20 minutes.

Joe Rogan (4:04)

It's a totally different drug than THC. It's an 11-hydroxymetabolite is what it is.

Doug Stanhope (4:10)

Did you say it fucks with your liver more?