#1623 - Doug Stanhope

Joe Rogan (0:03)

The Joe Rogan Experience. Trained by day, Joe Rogan, 엔 Podcast by night, all day.

Doug Stanhope (0:15)

Doug, I am fucking nervous.

Joe Rogan (0:18)

Why, for real?

Yeah. Why?

Doug Stanhope (0:20)

It's a, no, it's a good thing. I haven't left my fucking house in a year.

Joe Rogan (0:24)

You've been totally locked up.

Doug Stanhope (0:26)

Well, I mean, I go to the grocery store.

Joe Rogan (0:29)

How did you avoid getting it? You didn't get it at all, right?

Doug Stanhope (0:31)

No.

Joe Rogan (0:32)

The cooties?

Doug Stanhope (0:33)

No, because everyone I know is a shut-in too. And I fucking loved it. It's like, I left a day after my year anniversary.

I packed a week before coming here.

Joe Rogan (0:47)

So all you've done is go to the food store?

Doug Stanhope (0:49)

Yep.

I went up to Phoenix for New Year's to see, it's a long story, to see a dog that I almost kept, but I gave away. Anyway, so yes, basically, no, I have not left Fuck It, Bisbee, Arizona in a year. And I didn't think it affected me until I left. It's like, if you stayed in bed for a year going, I don't need to walk, I know how to walk. And then after a year, you're like, fuck my legs. I'm atrophied.

Joe Rogan (1:22)

What feels the weirdest?

Doug Stanhope (1:24)

Just figuring out how to pack for the road.

I packed everything. I drove and I left Sunday to be here Wednesday. It's a 13 hour drive. I could have done it in one shot, but I was so excited. I'm gonna leave on Sunday and just take the back roads. And I practiced talking on the phone before I came here. An hour and a half before, I'm just calling people. Like I don't talk to anyone on the phone. The only time I use the phone is to figure out where to meet you to talk. I don't socialize on the phone. You and I talk maybe twice a year tops. And when I see it's you, I go, do I have an hour?

OK, I'll make an hour because we don't. But otherwise, so I was like, I haven't talked to people other than do you have a room available for three days? Three and a half days. So I was calling Bingo and Brian Hennegan, going, just talk to me like.

You know, I packed what I thought was a carload of shit. I forgot vodka, which is my go to drink, and a shirt.

I only had the T-shirt that I was wearing that after three days started to stink. And I went, fuck, I didn't pack another shirt.

Joe Rogan (2:45)

Did you go shirt shopping then?

Doug Stanhope (2:46)

Yeah, I went to the thrift store.

Joe Rogan (2:48)

Oh, thrift store.

Doug Stanhope (2:49)

Yeah, of course. Yes.

You notice I'm fucking, I didn't, like I brought two different suits, like goofy suits.

Joe Rogan (2:57)

Right.

Doug Stanhope (2:57)

I'm like, I've been wearing pajamas for a year. I think I would be even more awkward if I was wearing a suit, especially with stupid hair.

Joe Rogan (3:05)

When did the goofy suits become a thing with you? Like what year?

Doug Stanhope (3:09)

1989, it started in telemarketing because my mother would send me goofy suits like that because they had just gone out of style, like in that earlier, that decade.

So they're, you know, fucking. It's like buying acid wash jeans now. Yeah, they're a fucking nickel a pair at the thrift store.

Joe Rogan (3:27)

I think Jamie has a few pairs. Acid wash, sweatpants. Oh, yes, that's right, sweatpants.

But that's your signature shit now, the goofy suit.

Doug Stanhope (3:39)

Yeah. And I go, I don't think I'm ready to put on a goofy suit. I don't know if it would clash with the goofy hair because people will show up at my shows in goofy suits.

Joe Rogan (3:48)

Oh, no.

Doug Stanhope (3:48)

They'll have like plaid on plaid. And you go, no, that doesn't work.

Like I I accessorize perfectly in a goofy suit. But I go, I have the goofy hair now. Is that like polka dots on plaid? I don't know. Right.

Joe Rogan (4:01)

Have you gone too far?

Doug Stanhope (4:02)

Yeah, I want to be comfortable here. So I'm wearing pajamas like I have for the last year.

Joe Rogan (4:05)

Why don't you just wear pajamas?

Doug Stanhope (4:09)

That's what I'm wearing. Well, pajama pants.

Joe Rogan (4:12)

Are those pajama pants?

Doug Stanhope (4:13)

Yeah.

Joe Rogan (4:13)

OK, there you go.