#1606 - Ali Siddiq

Ali Siddiq (0:29)

Lava Dive, Sam Kenison.

Joe Rogan (0:31)

Yeah, did you ever do The Laugh Stop? Did you do that place?

Ali Siddiq (0:34)

I did The Laugh Stop.

Joe Rogan (0:35)

Did you do the old one in river Oaks, or the upstairs one?

Ali Siddiq (0:38)

The old one in river Oaks.

Joe Rogan (0:39)

Yeah, that was the shit, right?

Ali Siddiq (0:40)

That was the, I'll always remember that place, because that was the only time I've ever in life, and I'm ashamed of this, I wanted a comic to do bad. And that was the only time I've ever wanted a comic to do bad, because I just started, maybe four months in, I.

Was like, I'm good, and he's 26 on this list, and I just started, and he's been doing it 25 years. Like, no, it's gonna be a long road for me.

I was like, no, and he wasn't. I was like, so relieved. I was like, oh, goodness gracious, thank you. It was ridiculous.

Joe Rogan (1:43)

That's a funny way of, that's, there's a lot of layers, right, to why someone succeeds or doesn't succeed in standup. And if you're 25 years in, and you're not doing well, like something, you've taken a turn the wrong way somewhere.

Ali Siddiq (2:28)

Please, Tara, please, Tara. I've seen other people that was terrible that night, that was up earlier than him, but I was like, I just wanted him to be bad, to be going right in front of me. So I was like, oh, I'm in a different ballgame.

Joe Rogan (2:38)

If that's the only time you've ever wanted someone to do bad, then you're psychologically well off.

Ali Siddiq (2:44)

Yeah, that's the only time. As a comic. That's amazing. As a comic.

I've wanted my son to run into the table, if that counts as-

Joe Rogan (2:54)

Just to teach him a lesson?

Ali Siddiq (2:56)

Yeah, I told him to stop running. I said, yo, man, stop running through here. Stop running through here. Like, yo, eventually, he's going to hit this table.

So I booby-trapped it a little bit.

Joe Rogan (3:06)

What did you do?

Ali Siddiq (3:06)

I put my house shoes, like, right in the way, and he didn't see them, and boom, right to the table. How old is he?

He's 10 now.

Joe Rogan (3:12)

Oh, how old was he then?

Oh, seven's a good age to run into a table. Like, you're not so big that you're going to hurt yourself. You're really just going to get hurt a little. And like, ow, but it's not going to be like an injury.

Ali Siddiq (3:25)

He fell apart. Like, when he hit the table, it's like, you ever hit your baby toe?

Joe Rogan (3:31)

Yes.

Ali Siddiq (3:31)

It doesn't matter. This is the only piece of your body that it does not matter literally how big you are and how much you work out. It doesn't matter. I've seen giant, my cousin's a huge dude.

I've seen him fold up in infant position from hitting his, barely scraped his baby toe on the edge of the table, and he's folded up. I'm like, yeah, all the muscles didn't help at all.

Joe Rogan (3:52)

Well, it's a bitch ass limb. It has no power.

Ali Siddiq (3:56)

But it can put you down. It literally can put you down.

Joe Rogan (3:59)

It's too painful for such a weak thing. It should be a thing. You know, like there's certain parts of your body that don't, they don't hurt if you run them into things.

You know?

Ali Siddiq (4:08)

Like what part is that?

Joe Rogan (4:09)

Knees. You can hit things pretty fucking hard with your knee.

Ali Siddiq (4:13)

Elbow.

Joe Rogan (4:14)

Yeah, elbows.

Ali Siddiq (4:15)

Yeah. Unless you chip that little piece, but elbow.

You know, forehead.

Joe Rogan (4:21)

Yeah, that's why headbutts work, right? Headbutts work.

Ali Siddiq (4:24)

Yeah.

Joe Rogan (4:25)

But little bitch ass toes. They just have no power. Like you can't curl anything with your toe.

Ali Siddiq (4:32)

And then your pinky, your pinky is definitely needed. I didn't think, like people will say this all the time, like I don't need all of my fingers. Y'all, you actually do.

Joe Rogan (4:40)

Jamie was saying that if you lose your pinky, you lose 50% of your strength in your hand.

SPEAKER_3 (4:44)

Yeah, I was just trying to figure out the pinky toe thing, because I was like, maybe the pinky toe is a little bullshit, but there's a doctor that explains it would be almost impossible to run, walk or skip without your pinky toe.