#1496 - Colion Noir

Joe Rogan (0:00)

Boom, and we're live. Hey, great to see you, thank you for being here. Appreciate you, man. I wore this just for you.

Colion Noir (0:04)

Hey, yeah, I like it, I like it.

Joe Rogan (0:06)

And thank you for the gift, too, man.

Colion Noir (0:07)

You're just pandering at this point, brother.

Joe Rogan (0:10)

I do, I wore this for you.

I had it, I knew I had it, I had to go find it. My daughter's friend's ex-boyfriend worked for Glock.

Colion Noir (0:20)

Ah, okay, okay.

Yeah, no, I had to get your gift, man. So it's my life pod, it's like my portable safe. Because you know, out here in California, you have to, if you're gonna travel with a firearm, it has to be in a locked case. And so when I travel out here to California, I do bring a firearm with me. I can't carry, because my license isn't recognized out here, but I can keep a gun in my hotel and stuff.

Joe Rogan (0:41)

What do you have to do to, Ted Nugent can carry everywhere, because he's like a sheriff or some shit.

Colion Noir (0:46)

Yeah, there's always, you know, you have those little special licenses.

Joe Rogan (0:48)

Yeah, you gotta, did you ever see the Steven Seagal show, the TV show, where he was a cop? It's like Steven Seagal, Lawman or some shit, but it's a real.

Colion Noir (0:58)

I think I was younger when it came out.

Joe Rogan (1:00)

He was a real cop.

Like he was arresting people. Like he was showing up at people's houses, you know, with a gun drawn. They're like, are you fucking Steven Seagal? I'm like, hey man, what's going on here?

Colion Noir (1:11)

Wait, hold on, so it was like a reality show.

Joe Rogan (1:12)

A reality show. This is it, right here. Yeah.

And he would pull people, and because he was in New Orleans, he developed this. Give me some volume on this. You gotta hear his accent.

Oh, we'll get kicked off of YouTube if we give it some volume. But you gotta watch it on your own. He developed his like, see his Louisiana accent. Oh, yes he did. Oh, yes he did. Oh, yes he did. Oh, yes he did. It was me and my friend Tom Segura's favorite show. We would talk to each other about it all the time.

Colion Noir (1:38)

Great thing is I grew up watching this dude, and so his foot, like he's literally running around.

Joe Rogan (1:42)

Yeah, ridiculous. Ridiculous.

I make fun of that dude all the time, and he deserves it. But he was a legit keto master. The suspect that we're looking for is sitting on the ground right there. See, now that's a normal accent. It varies. It varies widely and wildly, depending upon who he's actually talking to. This is so real. Sometimes if he's talking to certain folks, he'll put on like a deep Louisiana accent. So how do I open this, bad boy?

Is this your brand?

Colion Noir (2:10)

Yes, so basically I teamed up with this company called Vault-Tec.

Joe Rogan (2:13)

That's when you know you're a real gun nut, when you got your own gun safe.

Colion Noir (2:17)

I think it only made sense.

Joe Rogan (2:18)

So how do I open this thing?

Colion Noir (2:19)

All right, so basically, there isn't a battery in it yet, but what you would do is, you see those clamps on the side? Yeah, so you put the clamps on, that makes it watertight.

And so, it's a lifestyle case also.

Joe Rogan (2:30)

Lifestyle case?

Colion Noir (2:31)

Yeah, so there are people, I just did a post where somebody was on a jet ski, and he had all his valuables and contents in there, because it floats.

Joe Rogan (2:38)

Oh, I see, I see what you're saying.

Colion Noir (2:39)

So he dropped in the water or anything like that.

Joe Rogan (2:41)

Oh, it says here, the pew pew pew life.

Get it? Gun people don't know what the fuck that means, if you say the pew pew life.

Colion Noir (2:49)

Yeah, gun people are non-gun people.

Joe Rogan (2:50)

Not, excuse me, non-gun people.

Colion Noir (2:51)

Yeah, no, they don't, they don't. They're kind of like what, church? You mean like, pew's in a church or a cat church?

Joe Rogan (2:56)

What does that mean? Pew pew, like stinky?

Colion Noir (2:58)

Yeah, like I wore a shirt one time, and the lady was like, what's pew pew? And she was like, what does that mean? I was like, guns. She was like, oh.