#1268 - Ron White

Ron White (0:00)

Ron White, it tastes like grape.

Joe Rogan (0:02)

Grape, hmm. It is grape, look at you.

Ron White (0:05)

Yeah, grape flavor.

Joe Rogan (0:07)

Grape, fucking nailed it.

Ron White (0:08)

That's where I got it. That looks good. We're live?

Joe Rogan (0:11)

Ron White, we're live.

We are? Yes, sir.

Ron White (0:14)

Well, what a fancy beginning.

Joe Rogan (0:16)

That's how I do it. I like to be professional. Cheers, my brother.

Ron White (0:19)

Cheers. Good to see you. Good to be here, man. Good to be here.

Joe Rogan (0:25)

Delicious.

Good to see you after that mentally intensive carbohydrate versus fat. I'm done.

Ron White (0:34)

You genuinely came out of there looking exhausted.

Joe Rogan (0:37)

It was a rough debate. They were going back and forth. They didn't like each other. They were mocking each other a little bit, but hopefully people got some information out of it.

Two good guys. They just, different positions.

Ron White (0:51)

They don't see eye to eye, Joe.

Nope, what are you gonna do? Hear them out.

Joe Rogan (0:56)

Exactly, what are you gonna do?

Ron White. So apparently, Ron White, you have a mug shot that we can add to our collection.

Ron White (1:03)

Yeah, I'll get one over here. I'll have it framed and send it on up.

Joe Rogan (1:06)

Fuck, yeah.

Ron White (1:08)

I'll make sure it's small enough to put on that wall out there, so it'll be a pretty big one. I'd like to have a pretty dominant spot over at the-

Joe Rogan (1:16)

Tell me what you need.

Ron White (1:17)

Experience.

Joe Rogan (1:18)

I'll give you a fucking six foot tall one, brother.

Ron White (1:20)

All right, all right. That's it, six foot tall.

Joe Rogan (1:23)

Yeah, get it printed.

Ron White (1:24)

Fuck it. Yeah, it was a bad picture.

It was really bad.

Joe Rogan (1:29)

So what? We're talking about this. This is a, you got busted for weed.

Somebody ratted you out that there was weed on your plane.

Ron White (1:37)

No, they didn't say there was weed on my plane. They said it was a drug smuggling plane.

Oh. And so there's a hotline that you can call, and they just piled it so I'd fired it.

And so I'm just sitting on the plane looking out the window, and there's drug dogs and people in vests and machine guns. And I'm like, what's going on out there? Well, but as soon as they determined that that's not what it was, that I just had some personal weed, that obviously somebody called in and lied, instead of going and arresting that guy, they took me to jail. That makes no sense at all. And then in the newspaper, the sheriff goes, well, he might not have had much pot with him, but who knows how much he did have? And who knows, I didn't kill somebody. How about we just put me up for murder right now?

Joe Rogan (2:21)

Yeah.

Ron White (2:22)

If we need no evidence at all, you know.

Joe Rogan (2:23)

Who knows he didn't steal? Larceny, how about that?

Ron White (2:26)

Something. Something. They drove by three meth labs and a dead hooker just to get to my plane.

And really the funny part of it was the next day, we were gonna go somewhere else in Louisiana. And then now I've got a, you know, just weed we can get rid of. That's all we can do, because they might do it again.

Next night, next place. Next place, more dry. So now we've got an apple we're smoking out of. There are two of them on horseback, and Alex feeds the apple to one of the horses as he's walking by. Oh, you can't take this little apple.

Joe Rogan (3:02)

So they tried to check your plane again?

Ron White (3:04)

They did check it again, but we just had come up with this little plan that, you know, we would just would, and he also had to eat a little bag of weed, and he was really stoned on stage, and really stoned. But we, you know, we didn't go to jail that night.

Joe Rogan (3:17)

Well, if you eat, just eat weed, will it get you high?

Ron White (3:21)

Yeah, absolutely it will. It takes a while, but it was a big old chaw of it. I mean, that's a big old lip full, cheek full.

Joe Rogan (3:28)

I'm surprised people don't chew weed. Like there's no one out there chewing.

Ron White (3:32)

It tastes like ass, dude. That's why nobody eats weed, even the cookies, you know, they gotta watch it to keep them tasting bad.