Is This Anything?

**Hammer** (0:00)
The Hammer and Nigel Presents is the song. It depends upon what the meaning of the word is.

**SPEAKER_2** (0:09)
Yeah.

**Hammer** (0:11)
Is this anything? All right, let's rock and roll. And we're brought to you by Indiana Unclaimed, a program presented by the Attorney General's Office here in Indiana. The Attorney General's Office reuniting Hoosiers with over one million dollars in unclaimed property every single week. You can find the program or fast, easy and free to search at indianaunclaimed.gov.

**Nigel** (0:33)
Is this anything? Plastic surgeons are now saying that patients are coming into the office with unrealistic expectations because all they see are these AI filters on social media.

**Hammer** (0:46)
You're kidding.

**Nigel** (0:46)
Here's a doctor.

**SPEAKER_2** (0:48)
Patients being prompted by not only selfies that they change with filters, but also with AI, Snapchat, Lysmorphia. Patients just continue getting surgery and never are totally satisfied with what happens. But unfortunately, they come in with images in their minds and they present images to us in consultation that are not accomplishable. So it introduces unrealistic expectations.

**Hammer** (1:17)
Boy, if you have to have a plastic surgeon who will take your money in any way, shape, or form, who will give you butt implants and calf implants and cheek implants and boob implants and penile implants, if you have to have a plastic surgeon say, hey, your expectations might be exceeding what we can actually do, that's something. Yes, this is something for sure.

**Nigel** (1:45)
Let me ask you a question.

**Hammer** (1:47)
Yes.

**Nigel** (1:47)
Let's say that one of our sales team members comes down here. Let's say it's Kelly Hyatt or Joe Koppel, either one.
They walk in the door and go, Nigel, we got a big buy. They want to do an endorsement with you, but it's with a penile enlargement company. Would you be willing to have the procedure in order to get the buy?

**Hammer** (2:10)
No, no, of course not. Why not? I'm not doing a penile anything. Now, what I would do is like, you know, this stuff around the eyes. I do like an eye thing. If there's any plastic surgery surgeons listening right now, I do something like that. I mean, you did the hair thing, right? I don't think I don't see much difference between the hair and the eyes. Like I've always had these bags under my eyes that just look like I'm constantly tired and like somebody punched me in the face. I'm sick of it. And aren't you sick of having a little wiener?
It served me well the past 50 years. I think I'm good right now.

**Nigel** (2:53)
I'm not ruling it out. Like if somebody is listening right now, that's like, hey, if I want to have a big endorser, I want Jason Hammer. I'm open to the idea. I don't think I need the help. I've never heard any complaints. But if I can go from like, you know, TJ. McConnell to Shaq, I'm in. I'm in 100 percent.
Oh, OK.

**Hammer** (3:22)
Well, you have fun with that, then.

**Nigel** (3:24)
I just want I got to talk about the recovery process because if it's painful, I'm out.

**Hammer** (3:29)
I'm sure I'm sure it is.

**Nigel** (3:31)
Is this anything? A mom played a game where she picked up tiny little NFL helmets like you get from the quarter machine. Remember those cool?

**Hammer** (3:40)
Yeah.

**Nigel** (3:40)
And she asked her toddler to name the team's quarterback of the helmet that the kid picked up. OK, the toddler never missed the team.
The kid knows his ball even when they told him a quarterback and asked him to pick the right team. It was effortless for this little sports genius. Who's the quarterback? Humps.

**SPEAKER_2** (4:03)
Kobe.

**Hammer** (4:04)
Jacobi. Pinnock.

**SPEAKER_2** (4:08)
Jerry Gough.

**Hammer** (4:10)
Jordan Love.

**SPEAKER_2** (4:11)
That's impressive.

**Hammer** (4:12)
Mendoza.

**Nigel** (4:14)
Goss.

**Hammer** (4:17)
Burrow. Matt.

**Nigel** (4:19)
Matt Stafford.

**SPEAKER_2** (4:20)
Who does champion?

**Hammer** (4:21)
OK, we can stop it.

**SPEAKER_2** (4:22)
We can stop it.

**Hammer** (4:23)
I should have had this kid pick my NFL draft for me.
For the fantasy league, my fantasy league, that I just, I hadn't been in fantasy forever. And then my next door neighbor, who's, who kind of talked me into it with all his buddies, where everybody's like 10 years younger than I am, and I'm the rookie coming into this league. I should have had this kid pick my draft because it would be better than what I did.

**Nigel** (4:48)
Should have had this kid talking football other than whoever filled in for Tony Katz earlier today. Good Lord, that was painful.